How to Deal With a Bad Singer

Does your first soprano sound like nails on a chalkboard? Not all people who say they can sing can sing. What do you do when you pick a wrong note?

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

Instructions

How to Deal with a Bad Singer

1. Bad singers are people, too. They deserve to be treated with kindness, care and respect. So try not to lose your lunch during their arias. They tend to find that insulting. Instead, watch them in a focused manner and think about Hawaii until you forget where you are.

2. Once they are no longer surrounded by a group of other singers, pull your special vocalist aside and ask them what their formal training is. Knowing more about them will help you understand where that horrible sound is really coming from. If they are untrained, then they can possibly be trained out of it. If they studied with Julie Andrews, there's a better chance they just can't sing.

3. Try gently directing them down the right path with vocal exercises in pitch and tone. If they show progress, great. If they don't, you may have to move onto Step 4.

4. Teach them the melody and let them sing nothing else. Whenever they ask for something more interesting, lie and say that the melody is the most difficult part. At least it will keep them off your case.