How to Keep Peace Between Friends

They're two of your best friends, but they can barely have a casual conversation without fighting. Often, you find yourself right in the middle of a nasty argument--or they refuse to speak to one another and expect you to be the intermediary. In this situation, you must keep the peace between your friends without damaging your own friendship with either.

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

Instructions

1. Discuss the situation with each friend individually. Emphasize the good things about the friendship and share your concerns about your friends' recent problems.

2. Organize group outings to restaurants or sporting events. Your friends will be less likely to pick fights with one another when they're in public, surrounded by friendly acquaintances. An enjoyable event just might help break the tension between them.

3. Steer conversation toward positive or neutral topics, particularly if your friends often argue about "loaded" subjects like politics or religion. Save those conversations for when you're spending time with each friend individually.

4. Avoid stepping into the middle of a conflict. Wait for both parties to cool down, and then speak with them separately. Never give the impression that you're "taking sides." If you do so, each friend will attempt to pit you against the other. That situation can damage the friendship for all involved.

5. Recognize what triggers your friends' combative behavior. For example, if they become more aggressive when drinking, suggest a get-together that doesn't involve alcohol. If either friend questions your decision, be honest about your reasoning.

[MidniteWriter]

on 2/29/2008 All good tips, thanks!