How to Communicate with an Estranged Sibling

The hurt and pain associated with having an estranged brother or sister often prevents either party from ever communicating. Mending your relationship may show you how much you have to gain from trying to communicate with an estranged sibling. This is a delicate situation, but here are a few tips to get on the path to a successful reunion.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Challenging

1. Write a simple, but honest to your sibling explaining that you want to let go of past hurts and create a new relationship. Write it in conversation form. Tell your sibling that you value him as a person and want to be a part of his life. Describe a few happy memories and clarify that you know your relationship will not be perfect, but it is worth giving it another shot.
2. Mail the letter; it's more personal than email.
3. Call your sibling on the phone after another week has passed. Have an idea about a few things you can discuss, before you call. Ask pre-planned questions. Keep the conversation light.
4. Depending upon the tone of the conversation call your sibling in another week or so, or write another letter and suggest a meeting--a causal lunch at a restaurant is always best. Get everything out on the table at that meeting--start slow though--don't put pressure on the budding relationship.

Tips & Warnings

• Do not get discouraged. It took years to build up the silence and it might take a lot of time and effort to break it down.
• Remind yourself of the great times you have had with your sibling whenever you are feeling frustrated.
• Do not bring up old problems. It will open old wounds and could start the cycle of silence all over again.