How to Meet Mr. or Ms. Right

Can this really be planned? Hardly. The last thing you want is to
become one of those desperate creatures who obsesses about the
need to be married. Gear your planning toward enjoying yourself and
at the same time increasing your exposure to potential mates.

Difficulty:

Moderately challenging

Instructions

1. Trust your instincts when it comes to knowing what you want. The older you get, the more discriminating your taste in potential mates becomes. This is a good thing.

2. Cultivate a wide circle of friends. Use e-mail, phone calls and birthday cards to keep in touch with as large a group as you can. If possible, be a social hub, the kind of person who brings different groups together. Instead of waiting for things to happen, get on the phone and initiate activities. Join a softball team or enroll in tennis lessons. See 201 Make a Networking Plan.

3. Control your anxiety about not having a mate. Your life is not on hold just because you haven't found someone. Take the time to enjoy yourself today. Read 501 Be Happy.

4. Move slowly and keep assessing compatibility. Don't try to convince yourself someone is Mr. Perfect when he might really only be Mr. Available.

5. Dump Mr. or Ms. Not Right immediately. You'll be much more successful in meeting someone appropriate if you're not carrying around the anchor of a failing relationship. See 31 Mastermind a Breakup.

6. Exploit gender concentrations. Gals, there are numerous guydominated activities where you will stand out. If you can ride a motorcycle, pilot a boat or argue about baseball with any skill at all, you'll be virtually worshiped by groups of men. Guys, at some point in her life every woman in the world has looked in vain for a skilled dancing partner. Sign up for dance classes.

7. Join a gym. In addition to helping you get fit, you get to see lots of active people in skimpy outfits. Gyms are basically like nightclubs but without all the pointless standing around. See 25 Design Your Workout Schedule.

Tips & Warnings

• If your friends don't like your mate, it's probably not a good match. They may be reluctant to be completely honest with you, but look for clues that there's a problem.

• See 29 Arrange to Meet an Online Date and 30 Plan the Perfect Date.