Things You'll Need:
- Books On Conversation Tips
- Breath Mints
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Step 1
Relax.
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Step 2
Learn to overcome the obstacles between you and great conversations. Shyness, insecurity, language or speech problems, and nerves can be minimized through study, training or therapy.
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Step 3
Enrich your store of conversational topics. Current events, movies and books, food and restaurants, music, psychology, and hobbies are all rich sources.
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Step 4
Practice the art of conversation with people you trust. Try out a new topic, a new manner of speaking, a new interest or improved storytelling on them.
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Step 5
Accept their criticisms - or praise - and use that, too.
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Step 6
Read newspapers and magazines; watch new and different television programs; attend more plays, lectures or even classes.
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Step 7
Jot down what you find interesting about what you learn, people you meet and what you've read. Practice talking about those topics.
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Step 8
Learn some opening lines that will lead to discussions and memorize them until they come out naturally: "You know, the other day I noticed how many people wear (glasses) (all black) (the same outfits) (bad ties) .... " Or, "Did you happen to see Mark Morris' latest ballet?"
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Step 9
Realize that everyone else is looking for a good topic too, and they may feel as uncomfortable as you.
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Step 10
Ask questions of the other guests that will lead to a lively discussion. For example, "Is it true that lawyers hate to be on juries?" "Do you think Oprah's book club is silly?"
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Step 11
Open your eyes, ears and mind and be thrilled, shocked and delighted at the outcome.
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Step 12
Be outrageous, but never obnoxious.
Comments
missyd said
on 2/27/2009 NPR is a great news/story source to draw conversational topics from. I can't tell you how many interesting discussions within my circle of friends have started from NPR stories- not to mention you hear the art of conversation in action on "Talk of the Nation" "This American Life" and "Fresh Air."
Anonymous said
on 8/8/2006 One thing I've learned about talking to others is not to ask too many questions, just talk. It's cool to ask some questions, but if you do it too much, they'll think that you don't have anything to talk about.
Anonymous said
on 2/23/2006 You do not always have to start a conversation. If you see a few people talking, just go over, and stand there for a few moments, listening, smiling, and looking friendly. If they are talking about things you are familiar with, or have an interest in, just join in. You never need a script, you never have to know what to say, just say what you feel and think. Sometimes, you can even change the way the conversation is going by a few words. For instance, if they are talking about a particular new movie, and you have not seen it, just listen, and when the other party stops talking, just add, "I have seen her in another movie, did you see it?" and suddenly you will be in the conversation. If they are talking about politics, well, that's easy to give your own opinion.
The main thing about being a good conversationalist is, for you to be well read, well informed, and interested in a lot of things. Read newspapers, listen to the news on TV, know what is going on in the world, read movie reviews, as well as TV reviews, be well rounded and you will never have to know how to make conversation. It will just come naturally. Never memorize 'how to converse' just be yourself, be informed, have a nice smile, and a good firm handshake and you will have it made.
Anonymous said
on 1/5/2006 You will feel more comfortable meeting people if you know that the conversation can be a brief one. Have a plan for gracefully disengaging from the encounter.
Anonymous said
on 11/22/2005 Be careful not to trap people in a conversation. You are supposed to be circulating and meeting many new people. 3 to 5 minutes and you should be on your way to entertain another guest. Don't corner your guests for an eternity.