How to Make My Husband More Responsible


There may be some things in your relationship that you and your husband did not discuss. It's quite natural for couples to make assumptions on who will take on which roles in the household. From taking out the trash to checking in on his aging parent, you two may have a few issues to discuss regarding his level or responsibility in life. If you approach him with the proper strategy, it's likely that you can steer him in the right direction toward being a more responsible guy.

  • Identify a few of the most pressing problems. Before you address him, prepare yourself with a few notes on which areas you need him to step up and take charge of. List the most important things as well as some of the minute concerns as well. Then, when you have his undivided attention, you can discuss several items at once.

  • Sit down with him one-on-one to discuss the issues. Make time to hold your chat at a time when neither of you is pressed for time nor distracted. Bringing up areas where he could be more responsible is sensitive. No matter if that's paying his ex-wife's alimony to making lunch for the kids, you want to have the conversation with him when you won't be distracted.

  • Provide positive feedback for what he has accomplished successfully. Start your conversation by telling him how much you appreciate the good that he does. From double-checking that all the doors in the house are locked to taking the dog out in the morning, tell him something great that you love about an area he is being responsible in.

  • Detail areas he needs to improve in. Go directly to the issues that concern you. Confidently discuss your views by confronting him head-on. Give him an opportunity to listen to each of your concerns individually before moving on to another issue and be sure to provide examples for him. Use a conversational tone instead of one that is dictating or too authoritative. Remember, he is your husband and you two should feel like you're equal.

  • Provide suggestions for him to accomplish those tasks. Immediately offer assistance to help make his process of becoming more responsible better. That means you volunteer to put a sticky note on the refrigerator to remind him it's garbage night or offer to buy organizing bins for him to clean up the mess in the garage.

  • Agree to have a review period where you will assess the situation again. Come together as a team to review if things he agreed to do have been done. Set up a reward incentive for his accomplishments, such a special date night for the two of you or you agreeing to serve as hostess for his poker night.

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