How to Build Self Confidence & Personal Poise
Ever wonder why some people have all the luck? They make friends easily, land great jobs, win accolades? More often than not, it comes down to personality. Not everyone is born with self confidence & personal poise, but these are skills that can be developed, and they should be. Confidence is often a matter of overcoming your fears. A few strategies can build confidence...and with it, poise.
- Difficulty:
- Moderate
Instructions
-
-
1
Practice good posture. It may sound obvious, but leaders stand and sit up straight. When your shoulders are straight and your head is up, you feel more confident.
-
2
Know your stuff. Confidence in most business situations--classroom, job interviews, speeches or presentations, for example--comes from knowing your subject and anticipating questions. In social situations, be prepared to discuss topics sure to come up, news, politics, art, wine...the topics to bone up on depend on the type of crowd you'll be socializing with.
-
3
Participate. Speak up, and join the conversation without trying to dominate with your extensive knowledge--and bore everyone to death. You'll score more conversational points by asking intelligent questions and discussing--not arguing--the answers.
-
4
Take a speech class. Fear of speaking is the most common phobia in the world. The only way to overcome it is to face it head on. Taking a class allows you to practice before you have to make a crucial presentation for a job.
-
5
To develop more poise, slow down. People are clumsy because they are nervous. Before a stressful situation, take a few minutes to breathe deeply and calm yourself. Pay attention and be ready when your name is called. Don't jump up. Rise gracefully, collect your things (purse, briefcase, keys) and move forward with purpose.
-
6
Be sincere, complimentary and specific. "You have a lovely home" is fine, but "You have great taste. Did you decorate the house yourself?" is a conversation starter.
-
1
Tips & Warnings
Practicing things like answers, greetings and handshakes may seem silly, but successful speakers do it all the time.
Etiquette and common courtesy are important.
You can practice party skills on strangers anywhere, like at the grocery store. Make eye contact, smile and be courteous.
Confidence builds as people react to your actions, and poise builds as you feel more confident.
Don't try too hard. Be friendly, but know when to stop talking and when to back off.
Accept that some people will dislike you on sight. It's just a fact of life, and it happens to everyone.
If you're attending a party where you know only the host, enlist his help. "I don't know anyone here, can you introduce me to a few people?" is perfectly acceptable.
