How to Remove Toxic Friends from Your Life

You may not get to pick your family but at least you can pick your friends. Take advantage of this by picking healthy friends who don't suck the life out of you. Friends come and go; people change for better or worse. You are not obligated to keep around toxic friends just because you have a history with them. The following steps will help you identify and drift away from friends who toxify your life.

Instructions

1. Ask yourself after you spend time with a potentially toxic friend, "How do I feel after hanging out with my friend?" If your answer is exhausted, relieved, frustrated and depressed, then you may have a toxic friend. Life is too short to surround yourself with people that don't add to your life in a positive way.

2. Watch for constant drama and emotional baggage. Toxic friends constantly need to talk about their lives and not yours, which is a one-sided relationship. Avoid getting involved or committing to a toxic friend's needs. Consider your own needs first.

3. Be strong and don't be afraid to say no. Consider when someone refuses to accept your first answer, they don't respect you. Watch for persistent requests or guilt trips, because toxic friends can be manipulative and do whatever it takes to get what they want. Remain calm and polite, but stick to your guns. Remember: No means no and you don't have to explain yourself to anyone. "I just can't means" - I just can't. They will eventually get the point.

4. Stop worrying what a toxic friend might think about you. Remember: If a toxic friend does not respect you, they are not worth worrying about.

5. Drifting away slowly from a toxic friend is often the least painful way to end these types of friendships. Avoid returning phone calls and claim you are busy. Get involved with hobbies, family or work toward a job promotion. Take your mind off a toxic friend by focusing on other things, which will provide a valid excuse when asked why you unavailable. Spend time with friends who recognize your time is valuable.

6. Recognize your limits and set boundaries. Make a clean break if the toxic friend you are dealing with has turned into an unhealthy situation in your life. Be straight forward and put an end to the friendship. Ending a friendship will be difficult and there really isn't a pleasant way to do it. Tell a toxic friend you don't want to continue the friendship due to the stress it has added to your life. Unless they want to change the things that are affecting your life negatively, then you can't continue with the friendship.

7. Spend time with friends who respect your boundaries and won't take advantage of your friendship. Create healthy boundaries in your life, and toxic friends won't be able to find their way in.

Tips & Warnings

• Toxic friends are also known as "emotional vampires".

• Keeping toxic friends in your life can be bad for your health.