How to Compliment a Child
Most parents want to raise confident and secure children. They sometimes give praise and compliments to their children in hopes of increasing their self esteem. Unfortunately, not all praise is beneficial if it is not accurate or earned. Simply rewarding a child's success and not the effort he puts into a task can depress that child's desire to try at that task again if he is not successful. The right approach to praising your child will build his confidence and determination.
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Instructions
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Always reward a child's efforts and the process she followed to get a result, instead of the of the actual outcome of her effort. This will reinforce the idea that the effort itself is more important than mastery of a task.
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When a child earns a great grade in a class, do not compliment him on the grade or say he must be really intelligent to achieve that high of a mark. If the child does not get a high grade the next time, he will feel he is not intelligent or worthy. Instead, reinforce to him that he must be a good thinkerm and ask how he achieved such a high mark. He will know you recognize the effort more than the outcome.
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Do not give your children material items in reward for their achievements. Instead, focus on praising their hard work. If a child works frantically for external gratification, she may become frustrated when things do not turn out the way she expected.
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Continue to give praise to your child when you feel his effort warrants it. Do not hold back on praise if your child has earned it. Children thrive on pleasing their parents and want to feel proud about their efforts.
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Tips & Warnings
Consult with a professional therapist or child psychologist if you are concerned about your child's behavior or are unsure of the proper way to compliment her.
