How to Be a Good Son-in-Law
When you get married, you not only get a spouse but you also get someone else's entire family. Getting off on the right foot with your new in-laws is critical to your long-term happiness. Keep in mind that their agenda can be totally different from yours, so it's important that you read them right from day one.
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Instructions
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Never say anything that's derogatory of your in-laws in from of them, even if it's in jest. They may joke about you, which you find infuriating, but their sense of humor instantly vanishes if you say something negative about them.
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Avoid telling your in-laws every detail of your past. You start out at a disadvantage because many parents want or expect to find reasons not to like you. You increase your odds of that happening by sharing all your life experiences.
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Let your wife fight her own battles with her family. If you insist on helping her out with the problem, you run the risk of them coming to agreement with her, then en masse turning on you. Support her in private, but never engage her family.
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Keep your beefs about your wife to yourself. If you think you can confide in your wife's relatives, you are wrong. They are continually testing you against what they'd really like in a son-in-law. You stand a much better chance by confronting her about the problem than you do by telling a relative.
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Expect nothing from your in-laws and be surprised if they provide something. You have certain expectations of your wife, but it's wrong to have expectations of her family. Until you know each other very well, it's unfair to set the bar high for them.
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Avoid sharing your income or other financial information with your in-laws because it will hurt you in one of two ways. They will be envious of your having money, or they will consider you unwise in the way you spend your money if things are tight. It's best to keep that information between you and your wife.
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