How to Plan a Funeral
Planning a funeral is a difficult task, in which you must consider the wishes of the deceased as well as the survivors.
- Difficulty:
- Moderate
Instructions
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1
Meet with the other principal mourners to discuss their wishes and preferences. Find out if the deceased left any instructions regarding the funeral. Discuss religious preferences and how much money the family is willing to spend.
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2
Consult with a religious leader or a funeral home if you would like help with any of the details, including location of a burial site or disposition of ashes, casket or cremation container selection, transportation, legal issues, flowers and music.
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3
Choose the site where the funeral will take place. This is most often a church or temple, but it could also be a funeral home or at the graveside. (You may also decide on a more informal memorial service.)
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4
Select someone to conduct the service. This could be a religious leader, funeral home personnel or a friend of the family.
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5
Appoint pallbearers if you are having a formal funeral. Pallbearers can include special friends or business associates of the deceased, though the funeral home can usually provide them if there are no preferences.
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6
Assign someone to give the eulogy. Typically, the family will choose a family member, religious leader or close friend. Contact the person who will give the eulogy as soon as possible to give him or her time to talk with the family and organize notes for the service.
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7
Consider including music in the service. Choose a piece with special meaning for the family, perhaps having a family friend be a vocalist or instrumentalist.
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8
Choose flowers for the service. What is appropriate depends on the family's wishes and the amount of money it wishes to spend.
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9
Place an obituary in the local newspaper announcing the date, time and place of the funeral.
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10
Consult the funeral home about having printed programs for the funeral service. Get input from the family regarding their design.
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11
Buy a guest book for guests to sign as they arrive, if one is not provided.
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12
Coordinate all of the above with the funeral home, which will arrange to transport the coffin to the funeral, remove the coffin to the burial site, or take care of other details as requested.
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1
Tips & Warnings
You are not obliged to purchase any goods or services from the funeral home, and doing some things yourself can save a great deal of money. Ask the funeral home for a general list of all the services it offers - with prices - and choose only what you want to pay for or can't do yourself.
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Comments
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Bls46
May 01, 2009
I am looking for information from anyone who has held a home wake funeral in IOWA -
maggiesmom33
Nov 24, 2008
Thanks Owen919. I ran into this issue when my grandfather passed and really liked some of the online funeral guest books as opposed to what was offered at the funeral home. You can find classy and cost effective guest books online - yes, there is shipping but most sympathetic sites offer a discounted overnight shipping for our specific cases (and there is typically no tax). Glad I helped!
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Owen919
Nov 12, 2008
To maggiesmom33: Thank you for posting those website suggestions; I was at a loss for a classy guest book for a memorial service (and needed it in 2 days!) and finding your comment was a godsend. I contacted all, and they were all good, but the first one you mentioned was GREAT. So nice, so understanding, and delivered a high quality book and supplies *overnight*... not cheap, (because I needed overnight shipping) but yes, it still ended up less expensive and *nicer* than anything else offered locally, including the funeral home. Thank you.
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Aug 08, 2006
Church services? Who would you like to perform the service? Casket open or closed? Who would you like to be Pallbearers? Music? if so, what songs? Is there a living will? Is there anyone/anything you would like to be said at your funeral? What picture, if any, would you like to have in the paper? Anything you don't want done? What do you want to wear? What is your favorite flower? What is your favorite color? What color looks best on you? Anything you want with you when you are buried? Anything you don't want with you when you are buried? Where do you keep all your insurance policies? Lawyer's name? Is there a burial policy? where is it? Where do you want to be buried? What funeral home would you like to be used? What kind of money is saved if any for your funeral? If out of town funeral from your home, would you like an in town viewing? and, would you like the paper in both places to have your obit in it?
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Feb 08, 2006
Have an enlarged photograph of the deceased placed in the church, crematorium, chapel of rest and reception, it helps loved ones to remember the good times.
