How to Talk to your Child About Race and Racial Differences

At some point, every child becomes curious about racial differences. No matter what our race, we understand that there are some things that set us apart from others. When a child is expressing curiosity about these matters, it is important that you not ignore their need for understanding. Once a child has mentioned it more than twice, it means that he is ready to deal with a talk about racial differences. You want to adjust it to fit every age level, but there is no time when it is too early to talk about these things of importance.

Instructions

1. Understand there’s no perfect script, but opening the door to communication is usually the best way to opening your child’s eyes to the diversity around them.

2. Understand that children pick up on racial differences very quickly. In fact, experts note that as early as two, children become curious about skin color and hair color. They also notice texture, eye shape and eye color. Pretending that everyone is the same is not going to work for your son. It's best just to be honest when addressing the differences.

3. At the same time you're discussing the differences, it's important that you also talk about what makes us the same. Talk about our inner qualities, and how customs, manner of dress or culture can be expressed in many ways.

4. Treat all questions with respect, and don't try to silence your child by making them feel like they have asked a forbidden question. It's important that she feels that it's alright to come to you.

5. Be simple, clear and honest with your answers. Don’t over explain. When you don’t know, say so.

Tips & Warnings

• Keep your answers upbeat and honest. Don't give it to the temptation to go on a rant about all the injustices of the world. You can share the truth, but try not to overwhelm a child with more information than they are ready to hear.

• Don't talk down to your child on issues of importance such as this. Treat them as an equal, as this is something we all share in learning and understanding.