How to Plan Family Meetings

Family meetings are a great opportunity to find out what's going on with your gang. They enhance communication and teach kids how to speak up and express their opinions. Meetings also keep everyone working as a team to plan effectively and set goals.

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

1. Set a regular meeting time and place when no one has to give up something major to be there--after Sunday dinner is often good. Let phone calls go to voice mail: By keeping this time sacred, you're letting your kids know how important they are.
2. Post an agenda on the refrigerator so everyone can add topics they want to discuss.
3. Let everyone take turns running the meeting. Teenagers or parents can rotate the job of taking notes and what decisions were made. Keep them in a binder for easy reference (see 265 Create a Household Organizer).
4. Set rules for the meeting and write them down. These might include speaking in respectful voices, confining topics to family matters, and how to return to the subject if people get off on a tangent. Make sure the parents follow the rules as well--no interrupting, listen carefully and so on. Establish who's got the floor and set talking limits with an egg timer.
5. Keep the meeting short, positive and fun. Meetings should not be used as opportunities to attack one another. Family meetings will fail if people focus on what's wrong.
6. Start your meeting by offering compliments to each other. Begin with comments like "I loved it when you . . ." Express your appreciation for each other and teach your children to say thank-you if they receive a compliment.
7. Give each person a chance to speak on each agenda item. Move on to discuss or troubleshoot other issues.
8. Coordinate who will cook meals each night of the week and who will clean up. See 297 Plan a Week of Menus.
9. Finish with a discussion of what's on everyone's calendar for the week ahead. A parent should write everyone's appointments, classes and extracurricular activities on the calendar. This is a good time to resolve any scheduling conflicts. See 266 Coordinate a Family Calendar.
10. Let the leader pick a way to end on a fun note. He or she can decide to have dessert together, turn the meeting into game night, make popcorn and so on.

Tips & Warnings

• See 14 Balance Home and Work.
• Even youngsters stand to benefit from a family meeting, so start while they're young.
• Hold an annual family meeting to plan for vacations, holidays and special projects.
• Family meetings are a good time to rotate chores and give out allowances.
• See 16 Set Goals and 248 Teach Your Kids About Money.
• Take children's opinions into consideration, but make it clear that on important matters, parents have the final say.