Relationship Counseling and Therapy

Listen to your partner.

When choosing a relationship counselor, find out whether she takes your insurance, what her hours are, how qualified she is, and whether she is available in an emergency. Your primary care physician can refer you to a counselor. You can also ask friends, clergy, or state and local services. Not every counselor works for all couples. Find someone who makes you comfortable, who you like and trust.

Basic

Relationship counseling and therapy sessions are run by a marriage and family therapist or a clinical social worker. If you are searching for relationship counseling and therapy, the service may be called marriage counseling or couples therapy. They are the same service. Relationship counseling is a form of psychotherapy. The therapists hold degrees or post-graduate degrees and may become licensed with the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy.

All Couples

Whatever the therapy is called, is it for all couples: heterosexual and homosexual, and married or non-married partners. Couples choose to go to therapy for a number of reasons. Some couples go to strengthen their relationship and communication skills, some go to work through a crisis, some couples go to help decide whether they want to continue with the relationship, and some couples go to resolve differences before long-term commitment or marriage. The goal of relationship counseling is to resolve disagreements and improve the relationship.

Process

In general, both couples attend marriage counseling together. If one partner is not willing to go to therapy, sometimes the other partner will still receive counseling. The treatment plan will depend on the nature of your problem. People attend relationship counseling for anger problems, infidelities in the relationship, addictions, communication problems, disagreements over raising children or divorce. Relationship counseling may also be used in cases of domestic violence. Please be aware that counseling is not enough to deal with potentially dangerous or life-threatening domestic violence.

You

Relationship therapy focuses on the relationship, but it also focuses on each partner's individual problems. If you are constantly fighting, you may have anger management issues. If you are upset all the time, you may have anxiety. Your personal problems and struggles need to be addressed. They do not just affect you. They also affect your partner and your relationship. Sometimes, even if you leave your partner, you may still be stuck with the problem.

Sessions

Your relationship counseling sessions will vary depending on your relationship and your therapist. Some sessions will involve little speaking, as the couple may be angry, holding grudges, or struggling to learn how to express themselves and communicate with their partner. Some sessions will involve the couple fighting while the therapist mediates and keeps everyone on track. Sometimes the therapist will be using psychotherapy on one or more of the participants, or she may be educating them on how to build a strong relationship.

References

• Mayo Clinic: Marriage Counseling
• Psychology Information Online: Couples Therapy
• Discovery Health: Relationship Counseling: Does It Work?