How to Achieve Closeness in a Long Distance Relationship

Being apart can be very difficult for couples, especially in the early stages of a relationship. Here are some ways to build closeness when you are far apart.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderate

The Reason

1. There are many reasons why the love of your life might be far away: military deployment, business, work or simply that you met and fell in love over the Internet.
2. No matter why you are apart, you each need a desire and commitment to maintain your relationship. It is not enough for only one half of the pair to do so.
3. You will have to have patience with slow or interrupted communication. If your mate is overseas, there may be unstable or intermittent Internet connections, slow mail due to being in or near areas of global conflict and infrastructure issues, such as undersea communications cables being cut.
4. You will need to trust one another and be honest with each other. Do not spend your precious time together accusing one another of cheating or pouting because you each took so long to get in touch.

Nurture Each Other

5. Write each other love notes, poems or essays about your feelings for one another. Send photos or cards or make care packages of favorite items. Don't forget to seal any letters with a kiss.
6. Send each other little surprise gifts by mail or order them online or by phone and have them delivered. They can be romantic or silly, but make them personal.
7. Dedicate a favorite song to your loved one using a "long distance dedication," or put a midi file on your blog along with the lyrics and send your mate the URL.
8. Keep bedroom talk to a minimum. Too much is frustrating if you must be apart for long. Use just enough to let your mate know you think he or she is desirable, but not so much that you spend your days burning with frustration. It can cause one or both halves of the couple to stray.

Tips & Warnings

• Both of you must be committed to maintaining a relationship.
• Be patient with interrupted or slow communication.
• Do not waste your precious time together accusing each other of cheating, or pouting about slow communication.
• Gifts need not be expensive. Love notes can be very meaningful.
• Tell your mate what you love about him or her every chance you get.