How to Request Money Instead of Gifts at a Wedding

Some couples prefer money over traditional wedding gifts.

To celebrate a couple's marriage, wedding guests bring presents for the bride and groom. Typically, the gifts are items needed to fill a new home. Many couples set up registries at stores, so guests know exactly which items the bride and groom are hoping to receive. For couples who are older or have lived together for some time, traditional gifts are less necessary, since their homes are often already filled with things they need. Some new couples prefer to receive money over presents, but don't know how to go about requesting it.

Instructions

1. Inform the parents of both the bride and groom of your decision. Many family members and close family friends will turn to the mothers, and sometimes fathers, for help getting a present. When a guest asks one of the parents where the couple is registered, the parent will know to say that they prefer money.

2. Let guests know what you plan on using the money for, whether it's for the honeymoon or as a way of starting to save for a big purchase. Having an exact goal for the money not only makes guests feel like they're really helping, but it can help the parents phrase the request delicately. For example, "Jim and Sue have everything they need to set up their home, but they certainly could use money since they're about to start doing reconstruction on the house."

3. Provide a place for guests to put their cards at the reception, since most guests give money inside a wedding card. This can cue other guests to pull out a checkbook. It's also a good idea to have extra envelopes on hand for guests who forgot to buy a card.

4. Create a registry on special wedding sites that allow guests to give money through the website. Then the couple and parents have a registry to point guests to, but still get the monetary result they were hoping for.

5. Include a short, humorous tale, poem, or quote on your wedding website that will give a polite clue that you would probably prefer to receive money. You can mention your plans and goals for the more expensive things you would like to do or obtain following the wedding--this will give guests a subtle hint that money would be welcome.

Tips & Warnings

• Do not request money in the wedding invitation. Any mention of gifts, registries or money in the wedding invitation goes against wedding etiquette.

References

• Wedaholic: The Etiquette Of Asking For Cash Wedding Gifts