How to Include Your Fiancé’s Children in Wedding Vows

Writing wedding vows is difficult enough, but it can be even harder when you try to work your fiancé’s children into the mix. The marriage not only makes you one with your partner, but also a part of the children’s lives, too. Including your fiancé’s child in the wedding vows is a great way to start this new chapter of your life.

Instructions

Difficulty: Moderately Easy

Things You’ll Need:

• Internet access
• Computer
• Notepad
• Pen or pencil

1. Consider the ages and interests of the children. What do they like, what do they do, and what sorts of things are happening in their lives? Reference these things in your vows.
2. Think next about your fiancé's relationship with their children. Use this to connect your fiancé to their kids in the wedding vows.
3. Apply yourself to the relationship between your fiancé and their kids, using the knowledge you have of both your partner and their children. Think of how you can be of help or support.
4. Try stream of consciousness writing. On a sheet of paper, write down your thoughts as they arrive, no matter how vague or incomplete. You can then revise them or build from them.
5. Leave what you’ve written for a while and focus on something else. Come back later to review what you’ve written, and build off of what you have, using your fresh state of mind to formulate concrete ideas.

Tips & Warnings

• Speak with sincerity. Make it clear you are ready to accept your partner’s children as your own.
• Find a quiet, comfortable place to do your thinking and writing. It’s best to find solitude to compose your thoughts, particularly ones as meaningful as your wedding vows.
• Thank your fiancé’s children in your vows if you can’t think of anything else.
• Avoid overanalyzing yourself. The best thoughts are those that come naturally, so don’t force anything. Just relax and speak genuinely of your thoughts and intentions as a parent.

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