How to Celebrate Easter Like a Sports Fanatic

Dye the eggs; hide the eggs; find the eggs; eat some candy—ho hum. Isn't it time to break the tired traditions of Easter Sunday as only a true sports nut can?

Instructions

Difficulty: Easy

1. If you attend church services, make sure to wear your Easter best. In other words, your finest NFL reproduction jersey or NBA sweat-suit.
2. Instead of the same old egg-dying fun, use crayons to turn two cartons of eggs into likenesses of your favorite NFL team’s starting lineup, plus the punter and place-kicker. Then hold a scrimmage for them. Then eat them (if you eat something fast enough these days, that’s a sport).
3. Watch the World Egg-Hunting Championship on ESPN. There isn't one? Well there should be.
4. Dye yourself in your team’s colors and go see a baseball game. If anyone asks, tell them you were ‘dyeing’ to see a game.
5. Run a marathon dressed as the Easter Bunny. Try to be discreet if you use the subway system as a shortcut.
6. Forget hiding eggs around the house and yard this year and go with golf balls, footballs, baseballs and so forth. Dyeing them might get a little messy though.
7. Go see a baseball game and ‘egg’ your team on to victory.

Tips & Warnings

• Wrap up the night by heading down to the local sports bar and starting the Bunny Hop.