You've spent months planning your wedding and have thought through every detail--or have you? Most couples forget to discuss and plan for their first night alone together as a married couple. If you want your wedding night to be an evening you will remember for all the right reasons, take some time to plan.
When you picture your wedding night, you may fantasize about the romance of your first "perfect" night together and overlook the realities. This situation can create anxiety and unrealistic expectations. Keep in mind that your wedding day is likely to be one of the longest and most exhausting days you will experience as a couple. When you are finally alone, you may be tired, tipsy or more excited about digging into the wedding gifts than each other, so don't worry. Your wedding night, while special, does not make or break your marriage. As long as you honestly communicate your expectations, feelings and needs, your wedding night will be wonderful--whether you have a night of mind-blowing passion or simply fall asleep wrapped in each other's arms.
According to Barbara De Angelis, author of "Secrets About Men Every Woman Should Know," one of the most romantic things you can do for your spouse is to remember that his view of "romance" may be different from your own. Men are visual creatures; before your wedding, take him shopping and have him choose what he would like to see you in on your wedding night, even if it is something you normally wouldn't wear. Remember, it is your gift to him.
During your reception, make it a point to make eye contact with him, touch him gently when you pass and let him know that you are looking forward to being alone with him. Noelle Nelson, psychologist and author, points out that men need to feel needed and wanted as much as women do and the little gestures go a long way in kindling romance.
You may believe your new spouse wants grand gestures like the ones in the chick flicks you have dutifully watched with her, but in reality, most women appreciate the little things that say you know, understand and love her as an individual far more. Taking the time to write her a love letter telling her all the reasons you are thrilled she has become your wife and leaving it on her pillow to find on your wedding night not only will make her feel special, but it also will be a keepsake she'll cherish.
Another way to make the evening special for her would be to have a CD of her favorite song, and once you are alone, tell her you would like one more dance. Remember, you don't have to "think big"; you just have to show your new wife that you have taken the time to observe the things that make her happy.