Christian Teen Dating Advice
For Christian teenagers, pressure from peers and expectations of others can make for a confusing and frustrating experience when it comes to dating. But the Bible does offer guidance on how to conduct yourself while dating.
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Christian Principles for Dating
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Modern dating practices were virtually unknown in biblical times, but the Bible has a great deal to say about living, relationships and how to act in a way that honors God. Paul describes the Christian life as one surrendered to God like a sacrifice (Romans 12:1) so any relationship must be centered on bringing glory to God. Paul tells Christians to be filled with the fruit of the spirit, including love, patience, gentleness and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23). Any dating relationship must always keep these ideas central.
In addition, Paul tells believers to not be yoked with unbelievers (2 Corinthians 6:14). While Paul does not prohibit dating an unbeliever, it is unwise to date those who don't share a concern for God's glory and for honoring Jesus in the relationship.
Important Questions to Ask
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Before dating, it is a good idea to ask lots of questions. Determine whether the person you are interested in would be a person you would like to share a life with. How well do you know them? Do they show you respect? Do they value what is important in life or are they consumed with trivial things? Do they keep promises they make? All these questions get at deeper character issues; if you can't answer some of them, maybe it is a good idea to get to know the person a little better before you begin dating.
Other Principles
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In a culture of emotional love and careless sex, perhaps the most important advice for any Christian teenager is to avoid the advice of the world. Friends and peers might be dating in certain ways. It might seem odd that you won't kiss after two dates, or that you want to stay abstinent until marriage. However, for the Christian teenager, standards have to come from Scripture, not from peer pressure. The New Testament makes it clear that sexual relationships outside of marriage are against God's design for man and woman (see Matthew 19:4-6; 1 Corinthians 6:16-20; 7:2; Ephesians 5:31). Never allow your peers to determine what is right for you.
Jesus continually emphasizes that sin starts in the heart. If the heart is pure, then actions will also be pure. Anger toward your brother is like murder; adultery is defined as having lust in the heart. Always check your motives and your desires, and align your heart with Jesus. Bathe every relationship in prayer. Ask God for wisdom, advice and guidance.
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