- The first step in drafting do-it-yourself divorce papers is to identify the state in which you are going to file. It does not have to be the state in which you are married, but unless you or your spouse is in the military, it has to be a state where at least one of you has a legal residence. Each state has its own jurisdictional requirements, and some involve a time period, such as a year of residency. Once you have identified the state that has jurisdiction over your divorce, the next step is to familiarize yourself with the laws of the state, particularly the grounds for divorce. Most, but not all states, have either no-fault divorce or divorce for "irreconcilable differences." In these states, a divorce can be granted upon request. Otherwise, you will have to provide evidence showing some fault in your spouse or in the marriage itself.
- The document that gets a divorce started is called a "petition for divorce," or something similar. It is a simple form that allows you to demonstrate proper jurisdiction and declare the grounds for divorce. The petition form also allows you to set forth your terms for the divorce, such as child custody, asset distribution, alimony and child support. This document must be filed at local state courthouse and served on your spouse (proof of service usually must also be filed). The most time consuming documents related to a divorce, however, are those that detail the marriage property, including all assets, income and debts. The forms are usually provided by the court and, in many states, do not have to be filed until after the petition is filed.
- If you are the spouse being served a divorce petition, you also have a responsibility to file papers in court. Failure to do so could cause you to lose your rights in the divorce. If you do not agree to all the terms in the divorce petition, you can file an answer (title of document varies by state) that lays out the terms you would prefer. If the court receives your response on time, and you attend any scheduled hearings, you and your spouse will be left to negotiate final terms. If you cannot reach a resolution, the court will intervene and decide for you. The two documents that finalize a divorce are the marriage settlement agreement, which contains the final terms of the divorce, and the divorce decree, an order issued by a judge granting the divorce. Both documents are standard forms obtainable through the court.
- Do-it-yourself divorce is quite realistic in cases where the parties are cooperative and agree to all the terms of the divorce. When the terms are contested, however, having a skilled attorney to explain and defend your rights can make all the difference in getting what you want. A contested divorce can drag on for several months and involve considerably more paperwork than an uncontested divorce. A contested divorce can create the need to file papers for temporary maintenance of some kind, in which one spouse is awarded living expenses in lieu of eventual alimony, or for temporary custody of children pending a final disposition. A contested divorce is much more difficult and time consuming to do yourself.
