How to Find a Cheating Man on Internet Dating Sites

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Finding a cheating man on an Internet dating website is not recommended and should be considered a last resort. Discover how you might find a cheating man on an Internet dating website with advice from a dating coach in this free video on dating and relationships.

Part of the Video Series: Dating and Relationships
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Video Transcript

Hi, I'm Sally Landau. I'm a relationship coach in Los Angeles, and my company is Dating Can Be Fun. The question is, how to find a cheating man on a dating website. I'm going to make an assumption that you're dating this guy and you think that he's been going out on you and you think you could catch him by going through the back door and searching through Cyberspace on an online dating site. Actually, it doesn't even really feel right to me, although you could. You could set up a fictitious profile, hope to entrap him, hope to catch him. It doesn't feel good to me. I'm hoping this doesn't feel good to you, and also it doesn't even feel like the right place to start. Now, let's say, for example, he is on a dating website. Let's say for example, he even has had some dates. I'm going to suggest this is a symptom in your relationship and not the cause, so you don't know why he's doing it. He's a heterosexual guy, maybe he likes looking at pretty girls. Maybe he's just doing a cross comparison and he really likes you and wants to see, you know, the competition out there and after doing this comparison, he finds you are really the one for him and he feels lucky to have you. Are you buying that, no? Okay, so maybe he really is out there dating. Again, I'm going to say it's a symptom. Before you proceed, there are questions that you need to ask yourself. One is, are you by nature a suspicious person, I mean really suspicious? Might you have overblown this thing? Number two, is your goal to entrap him, to humiliate him, to get him in a corner, to show him that you're right and he's wrong? Is that what you want in a relationship? Or is it possible, have you actually looked inside what your participation may have been in this relationship what you might have done to make him take this path? If this is happening and you really have the suspicion, whether it's well founded or whether it's just driving you nuts, it's time to have that discussion with him. Sit down and have a meaningful talk. This isn't about where is this relationship going, because that's kind of accusatory and can also feel like a form of entrapment. It's about where are you both in this relationship and what do you expect. Are you on the same page? This can be an amazing moment for the two of you. You can clear a lot of cobwebs out and while you're having this discussion, you could say okay, maybe I have some issues around suspicion, perhaps it's abandonment and I would love it, I would appreciate it if you'll be patient with me while I work these out, as I hope during this time, you'll be working out your issues. I'm Sally Landau. I'm your relationship coach, and my company is Dating Can Be Fun.


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