How to Cope With Not Getting Asked to the Prom

Video Transcript

"Hello. I'd like to help you give some tips on how to handle or cope with not getting invited to a prom. That's like the bomb for any teenager. My name is Dr. Felicia, I've worked with teens many, many years, and I've heard many sad stories. But there are certain things that you must keep in mind in preparing for a prom, and that prom night. Well it's sort of a passage of life for all teens going through high school. It's important to remember that things have changed in this era, it's not such a stigma if you go to that prom with another friend and buddy up. Singles go as well as couples. But the idea is for you, if you are going to decide to go, is to go with confidence. And just know that many times it's not so much that it's not you're personal traits, etc. that kept you from going to the prom, as much as it is the circumstances of how many- a lot depends on your competition, who else was going, how much activity you had during the year, how many people you're interacting with. And it's very hard to get over shyness, or to get over the fact that, "oh gosh why is it me", but you want to overcome that pity. If you do go to the prom, you want to walk in with confidence, you want to hold your head up high, and you want to mingle as much as you can. Move around the floor so that you're not just sitting in one chair, and you're actually looking like you're active. Go up, get a drink, go to the ladies room, mens room, whatever that'll be. And make sure that you casually talk to a few people. Remember, everyone is shy at a certain age, and during the teen years, most people do kind of hold back a little bit, so somebody has to take the initiative, it might have to be you. Now some of this you might of thought of thought of before the prom was coming, as it was approaching, there was probably somebody in mind that you wanted to ask, and you didn't do it because you might be shy, etc., but those are things that you're going to have to work towards in the future, so the next time around, that may not happen. So that by senior prom you might be able to work through that. Remember, it's not just you who's shy, it's the other person as well, so someone has to take the initiative. So try to be confident, rehearse if you have to in front of a mirror, rehearse by inviting somebody, rehearse talking to somebody. I find that when you're talking about sensitive topics, it's easy to approach a person, and make a joke of it; "hey, by the way, I hear you're going to the prom", and if they say, "yes", you know you're not going to invite them to the prom. But if you say, "hey, I hear you're going", and they say, "no I'm not", that's your perfect opportunity to step in and say, "well, would you like to". So sometimes when you approach these topics, if you use it with a sense of humor, it kind of gives you an out in case it isn't very effective for you. So, do keep in mind self confidence with it. And good luck, it's a past of life for all of us. God bless. Dr. Felicia."