How to Tell If You Are Being Manipulated

Video Transcript

"I'm Joe Cuenco with Family Resources. Today we're going to be talking about how to tell if your strings are being pulled, or basically, how to tell if you're being manipulated. Manipulation ranges all the way from subvert actions to very overt or direct actions, and it's really defined as a means of gaining control socially or mentally over a person by methods which an individual would consider unfair. So, if you feel like you're being pushed to do something that you don't want to do, chances are, you might be being manipulated. Now, there are very many direct ways to determine if you are being manipulated. You could be coerced, you could be forced, you could be badgered or bribed, worst case scenario, into engaging in some behavior that you don't want to. There are also some very subtle aspects. There could be some indirect control, perhaps withholding, denial; or there could be subtle offers or negotiation to make you do something that you might not be wanting to do. These are typically not done out in the open, but once you understand what's happening here, you need to go in with both eyes wide open, in order to understand, analyze and try to detect these behaviors to see what's going on. Now there are some degrees of manipulation that are really OK, because there is actually a fine line between manipulation and compromise, some say, but recognize that what you don't want happening is you being forced into doing something that you really don't want to do and some really negative consequences. All actions and interactions can result in some compromise, attain a win-win situation, but when somebody is doing something behind the scenes, and pushing you to do something you don't want to do, chances are you're being manipulated, and it's negative. There are many books on the subject. Use the internet to do some research, and also there are some workshops on marriage and relationships in general to help you understand the good and bad behaviors. That's how we tell if we're being manipulated. I'm Joe Cuenco with Family Resources, Relationships for Life."