How to Break the Ice

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To break the ice with someone, practice starting conversations in comfortable situations, work up to conversations in unfamiliar situations, and learn to read the signals from other people. Understand the risks taken when breaking the ice with a new person by using insight from a psychologist in this free video on dating.

Part of the Video Series: Dating Tips
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Video Transcript

Hi. My name is Reka Morvay. I'm a psychologist. And I'm going to talk to you today about how to break the ice. If you're having trouble introducing yourself to new people and getting to know new people in a new situation, then, you know, rest assured that this is a skill that can be improved with practice. So the more you do it, the more comfortable you will feel introducing yourself in new situations. The best way to start practicing is actually in situations where you already feel comfortable. So I probably wouldn't recommend going to a party where you don't know anybody, and trying to kind of thrust yourself out there, and meeting somebody who you already think is way over your league anyway. So if you already have some environment where you feel comfortable, so maybe a club, or your workplace, or at school; and there's a person that you don't know, you can start practicing in a familiar environment. It also works best if you're already doing something together. That gives you an excuse for why you want to approach this person and start talking to them anyway. Once you feel comfortable in more familiar settings, then you can expand your skill and go out there in more unfamiliar environments and try your newfound skill and your newfound confidence on those environments. But you always have to expect that if you put yourself out there, that is taking a certain amount of risk. Now the more comfortable you are with yourself, the less risk you will feel that you are taking. But nonetheless, you have to be prepared for the fact that sometimes people will not react positively, or sometimes they will just react neutrally and, you know, you will be able to see that they are not looking to meet somebody right then. So with practice, you will be able to read these signals, and you will become more comfortable with the whole process of introducing yourself to a new person.

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