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Step 1
Be the best you can be. Ask yourself "what would I want in a partner", and then seek to incorporate those traits within yourself. Love yourself first before you set an expectation for someone else to love you.
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Step 2
Think before you speak. If you're feeling frustrated, always take a deep breath and think first. When you speak from anger, it will come out accusatory. If you must first count to 50 or 100, then do so. Focus on the issue itself and do not attack your partner personally. After you have thought it through, then speak to your partner about it. Give respect, and you will receive respect in return.
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Step 3
Be friends with your spouse. Have fun conversations as you would with your girlfriends and/or guy buddies. One of the biggest mistakes most people make is that they marry their partner before they know whether or not they're compatible. If you are compatible, then you will never run out of interesting topics of discussion.
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Step 4
Make your marriage a life-long courtship. Love is very powerful! You can use this power to your advantage or disadvantage. Just because the honeymoon ends doesn't mean the romance has to stop. Set aside a "date night". Find creative ways of keeping the courtship alive, ESPECIALLY after you start having children!
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Step 5
Ask for what you need instead of complaining about what is wrong. If something bothers you, then tactfully ask for what you'd like to have. For example, if you'd like to go to a movie, then say "I'd like to go see a movie" instead of "we never go to the movies anymore." Asking sets a positive tone and is more likely to get your desired results.
Comments
AlohaVikki said
on 12/16/2008 Asking rather than complaining is a real important tip. Complaining comes from a sense of powerlessness, asking comes with an attitude of respect for yourself and your mate.
iamageniuster said
on 10/21/2008 Excellent idea. Thanks for sharing. 5 stars!
2besure said
on 9/8/2008 Thank you for this article. I have been married for 18 years. I did not marry until I was 38 years old. I spent a lot of years learning how to be a wife. I was very independent.
missnice104 said
on 9/8/2008 I'm not married but I loved this article! I also believe it should be a life-long courtship!!! Excellent article Cathy!!!!
Cougar1002 said
on 8/29/2008 Wonderful tips in this! My husband is definitely my best friend! :)