How to Heal From the Pain & Loneliness of a Broken Heart

Be open to feeling the pain, and take responsibility for your feelings Live in the present, and focus within, tuning into your feelings - the physical sensations within the body. Choose to be mindful of and pay attention to all distressing feelings rather than protect against them with substance and process addictions. Make a conscious decision that you WANT to take responsibility for your feelings.

Invite the compassionate Presence of Spirit into your being to help you learn what you are doing or thinking that may be causing your pain. Learn to relax, meditate, pray, or whatever your method of calming peace may be. There are typically two possible intents in any given moment: to protect against pain and avoid responsibility for it through trying to control yourself and others, or to learn about what you are doing or thinking that may be causing your pain so that you can move into loving yourself and others. When you are in the intent to learn you are a loving Adult. When you are in the intent to protect and avoid, you are operating from your ego wounded self. It is important to welcome and embrace all your feelings with compassion.

Discover the thoughts/false beliefs from your wounded self that may be causing your fear and pain; release anger and pain in appropriate ways; learn about the past that created the false beliefs; nurture your wounded self; explore your core self and what brings you joy.

Ask your spiritual Guidance (whatever that is for you): What is the truth about the thoughts/false beliefs you may have uncovered in Step Three? and What is the loving behavior toward yourself in this situation? What is in your highest good? What is kind to yourself? Open and allow the answers to come through you in words, pictures or feelings. The answers may not come immediately, but if you have a sincere desire to learn, they will come.

Take action. Tell yourself the truth and take the loving action that came through from your guidance in Step Four. Consciously move into gratitude for your Guidance that is always here for you.

Evaluate your action. Check in to see if your pain, anger and shame are getting healed. If not, go back through the steps until you discover the truth and actions that bring you peace, joy, and a deep sense of intrinsic worth.