How to defeat your old friend, STRESS

Regarding your problematic stress response as a best friend based on Fritz's perspective enables you to benefit from what he calls the law of reversal. You use the negative energy surrounding the problem to propel you to positive forces available and to achieving a solution. In other words, that which stresses you also points the direction to greater health and well-being.

One of the paradoxes of control is that to feel like you have more of it, you have to let go of your dire need for it. To successfully drop back a bit in your need for control, take a different path; attempt counter control measures:

* Develop perspective. Step back from the problem. A month from now, will you even remember what's bothering you today?

* Be realistic. Is this a situation for which you can make a difference? Maybe not.

* Look at the big picture. Having a sense of purpose or a mission in life routinely offers peace of mind independent of the nitty-gritty problems that you face on a daily basis.

If you feel as if you're part of the proverbial rat race and the rats are winning, here are some suggestions that offer a change of pace, something away from the ordinary that may help you to achieve lower levels of stress. Not all of these will appeal to you, but, often, simply changing your routine a little is a great help.

* Go through your closets and drawers, and pull out everything you haven't worn in the past two years. Set the clothing aside, and donate it to the Salvation Army, Goodwill, your local church, or any other outreach organization.

* Plan a vacation by getting brochures, pamphlets, books, or advice from friends on where to go for a relaxing week or weekend.

* One inclement Sunday afternoon, go through your bookshelf, pull out the books you know you'll never want or need to read again, and make a donation to your local library.

* Challenge yourself to make small improvements in your daily life, such as leaving the house on time or putting your seat belt on before starting your car.

* Actually celebrate any forthcoming holiday by getting together with friends or family members.

* Eat dinner early one night each week this month to make time for family conversation.

* Eliminate all extraneous noises that compete for your attention at dinner. Cut off the TV and radio, and find out what's going on in your family members' lives--talk to each other.

To win the war on stress requires only small steps, applied consistently. You can head off to the mountains for a weekend and hang out with the peace and love gurus, but then, hey, you've got to live in the same world you just left. You might as well make small, incremental changes right where you are!