Comments on: How to Get Over a Breakup

on 11/22/2005 Listen to Christina Aguilera's song; "Thank you." This song makes me emotionally stronger, makes my skin a littler thicker, and makes me that much wiser.

on 11/22/2005 A person does not really love you if they ignore you. If you are the one who wants to get back together with an ex, and your ex does not want to be together, you need to treat your ex as they treat you. You have to fake the fact that you are hurt. You must not say anything to them about your pain. They act as though they don't care; you must do the same. Go out and enjoy yourself, don't speak to them when your enjoying yourself. Turn off the phone and ignore their e-mails. In time, if they don't call or respond. it was not meant to be. True love conquers all. If they do call, act like you don't care. Be quick and brief, as they have done to you. What comes around must go around. Never show your weaknesses. Be Strong. Love yourself.

on 11/22/2005 Keep a diary, write in it every night. Write down everything about the relationship. Good times and bad. When it's all out of your system, and down on paper, focus on the new wonderful things that are happening. Cherish the simple pleasures and the new experiences. Don't make your day revolve around the memory of what you had. Otherwise, how will you make new memories?

on 11/22/2005 You have to realize when someone walk out of your life, then it was never for you. True love stick together through thick and thin. If this person is easily to be swayed or is a Momma's boy then he is weak mentally. So don't regret or sweat this person. US women do not need a Man that Momma or other people make their minds. We need a strong loyal Man that will stick with us through whatever, and Momma is X out. Plus that is a big turn off.. So if you'll focus on that alone, It'll make it easier for you to get over it. If you are a spiritual person then you have to look at it as a learning experience sent from God. God allows people in our lives for a "reason and season". This will only make you stronger in the next relationship. Remeber God does not make mistakes. If you know you were in no wrong then that person has a problem anyway! That person needs HELP. And you better best believe his next relationship will be the same if he does not re-evaluate his self. So you are NOT the problem it's him and we don't need that mental abuse anyway. Don't sweat. Let it go 2005.

on 11/22/2005 1. Go out with your friends and enjoy life.
2. Think of all the things you didn't like about your ex, it will help.
3. Write your feelings down in a journal.
4. Go out with someone else.
5. Get rid of all the things that remind you of your ex, no matter how dear they are to you.
6. Put your time into something else, like joining a football team, getting a hobby, or meeting new people.
7. Don't bother with your ex. Even if you split up on good terms, it makes things harder if you try to stay in contact with them.
8. Listen to music that makes you feel happy.

Follow these tips and you should be OK.

on 11/22/2005 We all try to show how strong we are when we get dumped. It doesn't always work. You should get strong, but you need to start by being weak.

If your love meant anything to you, you should not let your ego stop you from begging and pleading with him or her, but only the first time they break the news to you.

That day (or as soon as the news has sunk in), go the distance and cry all night. Beg, cajole, and plead with him to take you back. Remind him of his promises and all your plans and dreams.

In the process, you will irritate the heck out of him! He will tell you (rather rudely) to stop it and leave him alone. Don't. Go ahead and say ALL that is on your mind. Unburden your heart to the one you truly want.

The next day, you will feel so horrible about yourself that in the days to come, you won't allow yourself to call or mail him. I have tried it. It works.

This will make you realize that the person who could refuse you compassion when you were in your lowest low is not truly interested in being there for you. You'll not want him back.

on 11/22/2005 Understand that everything happens for a reason. You lived, you learned, and there's no point in dwelling on what could have been. Think about what will be, and focus on that instead.

on 11/22/2005 Don't get drunk to forget about your ex. Overdoing it may lead you to "drink and dial," and you WILL regret it the next day. Also, the physical discomfort of a hangover makes the depression worse, which may lead you to drink again. If the pattern repeats itself, you may find youself in a state of dependency.
Be careful with food, too. Grieving with a pint of Cherry Garcia is okay for a day or two, but making it a habit will only depress you further, particularly after the weight gain begins.

on 11/22/2005 Heartbreak is the worst feeling in the world. It takes you over and controls your life. I have found that doing the opposite of how you feel helps. You want to call your ex, so don't call. You don't want to sleep, so sleep. You don't want to eat, so eat. You don't want to go out, so go out. Each day will get better, I promise. Remember, crying is healthy. It means that you're human.

on 11/22/2005 I think it's good to find a song that describes the pining that you feel for them. Play the heck out of it until you get sick of it (and thus sick of the person). I think that a really good one is "Time is Running Out" by Muse.

on 11/22/2005 I got this tip about death from my martial arts instructor. It also helps with relationships, because the breakup part of it can feel like death. You are losing someone in a different way.

S is for sadness. Of course you are going to feel sad. It is just part of the grieving process. Just cry and lean on friends.

A is for anger. Even while being sad, you will get angry at yourself or your former mate. Just don't do anything irrational. Take your anger out on a punching bag or the treadmill. This will make you look great and relieve your frustrations.

R is for revenge. Everyone wants revenge when they are hurt in any way. It is understandable, but you must control this emotion. If you do certain things to get revenge, you could get yourself in trouble, and the word will be spread that you are a "psycho."

A is for acceptance. Eventually, you will come to accept it and know that you are on the way to getting through it. Just remember them as the end of a chapter in the book of life, not the end of the book. Start another great chapter.

H is for happiness. Although it may not seem possible early in the process, it will eventually happen. Remember that there is always more in life for you to experience.

I hope this helps. I am still at the angry stage myself, but I will "keep on truckin."

on 11/22/2005 Treat yourself. Pamper yourself. Buy something you want or eat whatever you want. It could make you feel better.
Be good to yourself. He doesn't know what he's missing!

on 11/22/2005 Think of the things that you love to do but could not do while you were still in the relationship. Single life is fun. There are less headaches!

on 11/22/2005 Conventional wisdom advises people to be weary of 'rebound' relationships, but from my experience, the only way to get out of feeling like: "S/he was the ONLY one for me. I'll never get over this. There's no one else out there" is to find someone new. Do this enough times and you'll realize there are as many Mr. Rights as there are Mr. Wrongs, so losing one will be seen in context. Don't sit at home and mope. Go out and screw someone new.

on 11/22/2005 If they are happier when you're not with them, it's best to just let them go. You don't want to hurt someone that you loved, right? So, let them go and life will go on. Everything happens for a reason. Think of it that way. You deserve someone much better, and that's why it comes to an end. Live your life and you will make it through!