Rules & Etiquette for Wedding Attire
It's not always easy to know exactly what to wear to a wedding, and etiquette can be overwhelming. While the rules for proper wedding attire may not be as hard and fast as they once were, no one wants to be embarrassed by under- or overdressing. The invitation is almost always a good indicator as to whether the ceremony is a laid back, casual shindig or a beach formal celebration under the stars---even if attire isn't addressed straightforward on the invitation. If the invitation leaves you stumped on what to wear, check the couple's wedding website, if they have one, or ask a member of the wedding party. Does this Spark an idea?
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Types of Casual Dress
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If the invitation reads "Casual," anything goes---with a few reservations. Unless noted otherwise, avoid jeans, shorts, tank tops and flip-flops (unless the wedding is beach casual). Mid-drift shirts and miniskirts should always be avoided. When in doubt, think office casual. For women, a simple dress, skirt or nice pants will do. Men can wear khaki or dress pants with a collared, button-down or polo-style shirt.
Dressy casual is a jazzed up version of casual dress. Women can wear a dress- or pantsuit, knee-length dress or skirt or suit pants with a dressy blouse. Men wear dress pants with a button-down shirt and may wear a tie. Wear lighter colors for spring and summer ceremonies that take place earlier in the day, and darker colors in fall and winter or for evening weddings. If the wedding is beach casual, ladies may wear a nice sundress, flowing skirt or even a tasteful pareo or sarong. Gentlemen, think knit shirts or polos. According to etiquette expert Emily Post, cargo and Bermuda shorts are also appropriate for both men and women to wear at a beach casual wedding. Flip-flops are typically acceptable as well.
Resort Attire
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If the invitation reads "Resort Attire," avoid flip-flops, according to Rebecca Black of "Etiquette Now!" Instead, opt for sandals or even loafers. Ladies, think country club casual when it comes to resort attire. Wear tailored slacks, pencil skirts or even lined, linen pants. Cardigans, wrap sweaters or styled jackets over a knit top or feminine blouse can complete the look. Gentlemen can wear khaki or dress pants with a polo, knit or button-down shirt and may wear a sport coat for a wedding that calls for "Evening Resort Attire".
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Tea or Garden Party
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For a tea or garden party wedding, think chiffon and pastel and light, neutral colors. According to Today Style Editor Bobbie Thomas, "fabrics for this affair should be light and breathable, especially in the hot summer months." Sundresses or tea-length dresses, hats and gloves can all be appropriate for this type of wedding, depending on the occasion and time of day. Gentlemen can wear light-colored trousers or khakis with polos or button-down shirts with or without a tie. He may even wear a summer suit.
Themed Attire
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The invitation will indicate dress suggestions for a themed or color-coordinated wedding. While themed and color-coordinated weddings may at first appear to have a restrictive dress code, these weddings can actually be some of the most creatively charged fetes, if they are done in good taste. You may wonder where on earth you'll find the perfect dress for the 1940s Glam themed wedding you've been invited to, or how you'll look in a plum-colored dress guests were invited to wear for a color-coordinated wedding, but at least you'll know exactly what to wear.
For men, festive attire can be as easy as a blazer or sport coat in the color of choice, according to Emily Post. Remember, the bride and groom chose this kind of wedding because they thought it would be fun, so go with it.
Semiformal
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Semiformal or informal wedding attire is along the lines of dressy casual. Ladies, pull out your little black cocktail dress for an evening wedding, or opt for a sophisticated skirt and dressy top. Heels are most appropriate. If the ceremony is during the day, wear lighter colors. Keep in mind that, like time of day, season will also dictate appropriate attire. Lighter colors are acceptable for a spring or summer soiree, and Black of "Etiquette Now!" suggests dresses in lighter fabrics for the warm weather. Men should don a suit and tie, keeping time of day and season in mind, of course. If the wedding invitation reads "Cocktail Attire," you can assume that means semiformal dress.
Beach Formal
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Beach formal weddings are two parts elegance and one part mellow, and guest attire certainly lends itself to creating a romantic yet sophisticated atmosphere. According to "The Knot," ladies should wear a "formal summer sundress at tea- or knee-length with flat sandals." Natural yet refined jewelry, hair and makeup complete the look. Men should wear a summer or linen suit and may or may not wear a tie. Khakis and sandals are also a good choice for him.
Black Tie Optional
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Black Tie Optional means the wedding is an evening, formal affair. Dark colors in neutral tones are appropriate for both men and women. Women will wear cocktail dresses, floor-length evening gowns or even a dressy suit. Jewelry, hair and makeup can be classic or fun, as long as it is in good taste. Men may wear a tuxedo jacket with matching trousers, a formal piqué or pleated front white shirt, a black vest or cummerbund and tie and black dress socks and patent shoes. Alternatively, he may opt to wear a suit and tie.
Black Tie
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Black tie, of course, calls for formal dress, and guest attire is similar to Black Tie Optional. Women may wear cocktail dresses or evening gowns. Thomas, Style Editor at Today, says that, "although floor-length is appropriate, you don't have to wear a heavy gown. If you do decide to go long, look for something fluid and goddesslike." She also suggests striving for a look that is chic and sophisticated over sexy. This precept should reflect jewelry, hair and makeup as well. Carry an evening bag or clutch instead of a purse.
Men will wear tuxes, of course, with a formal, piqué or pleated front white shirt, a black vest or cummerbund and tie. A white dinner jacket is appropriate for summer or cruise weddings. Keep in mind that there are different kinds of black tie affairs. Though not very popular, Creative Black Tie allows room for a modern twist---a tux with a dark shirt and no tie, for example. Creative Black Tie can even include themed dress, such as Texas Black Tie: boots acceptable.
White Tie
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White Tie is an elegant, super formal affair. Ladies will wear ball and evening gowns and may even wear gloves. According to "The Knot," "glamorous makeup and dramatic jewelry and hair are appropriate." Of course, you'll want to carry an evening bag or dressy clutch. Gentlemen will wear a formal tuxedo: a black tailcoat, trousers with a single satin stripe, a white piqué shirt, vest, bow tie, and gloves with black dress socks and formal shoes.
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- Photo Credit Beach Wedding image by Michael Wuelfrath from Fotolia.com
