Tombstones have traditionally been used as repositories for information about the deceased, from dates of birth and death to personal philosophies and quotes. For Halloween, you can create your very own cemetery full of fake tombstones bearing funny, famous, spooky or otherwise interesting epitaphs. This project is a lively way for families to create something unique and imaginative together.
Create a Halloween graveyard that causes a giggle rather than a gasp by decorating your tombstones with funny epitaphs. Some to consider, collected from Quote Mountain are:
“I was somebody. Which is no business of yours!”
“I told you I was sick!”
“Gone away owin’ more than he could pay.”
“Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake; stepped on the gas instead of the brake.”
You can also use funny names on your tombstones as well, including: “Otta B. Alive,” “M. T. Tomb,””Izzy Gone,” “I. M. Gone,” “Roland Stone: Gathering No Moss” and “Dracula: Fangs for the Memories.”
Create a celebrity graveyard full of tombstones that offer some famous names with epitaphs, such as:
Jesse James – “Murdered by a traitor and a coward whose name is not worthy to appear here.”
Dean Martin – “Everybody loves somebody sometime.”
Virginia Woolf – “Against you I will fling myself, unvanquished and unyielding, O death!”
Bette Davis – “She did it the hard way.”
George Washington – “Looking into the portals of eternity teaches that the brotherhood of man is inspired by God’s word; then all prejudice of race vanishes away.”
Frank Sinatra – “The best is yet to come.”
Oscar Wilde – “Alien tears will fill for him Pity’s long broken ern, for his mourners will be outcast men, and outcasts always mourn.”
You can suggest that the graveyard is full of ghosts by adding spooky tombstone epitaphs from, like “I’ll be back,” “C.U. Sune,” “Stella Live,” “Bach Agenn” or “Will B. Back.”
Use epitaphs that give the gruesome sense of bodily decay, such as “Rott N. Flesh,” “Rick Amortis,” “Good N. Rotten” and “Dee Cayed.”
Create a graveyard of spooky characters with epitaphs for Jeffrey Dahmer – “Mmm…mmm…good” – and Count Dracula – “1236, 1458, 1525, 1703, 1823, 1955,” and then the year of your Halloween graveyard.
Add to these the names of Halloween party guests or neighbors, with epitaphs such as “Connection terminated” or “I’ve done this a million times!”
Epitaphs From Real Graveyards
Recreate real tombstone epitaphs to give your display an authentic feel. For example:
“Goembel, John E., 1867-1946. The defense rests.”
“Jedidiah Goodwin, Auctioneer. Born 1828. Going! Going!! Gone!!! 1876.”
“Here lies Lester Moore. Four slugs from a forty-four. No Les no more.”
“Rebecca Freeland, 1741. She drank good ale, good punch and wine. And lived to the age of 99.”
“Here lies Johnny Yeast. Pardon me for not rising. Ruidoso, New Mexico."
You can also give your Halloween tombstones a local flavor by visiting a nearby graveyard for real-life epitaph ideas.
- Photo Credit quadxeon/iStock/Getty Images
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