How do I Compare Differences Between Male & Female Friendships?
Males and females tend to value friendship differently. For example, females value emotional intimacy with female friends, while male friends appreciate loyalty in times of conflict. To complicate things, consider female-female friendships, male-male friendships and male-female friendships and their differences.
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Females Value Emotional Intimacy More Than Males Do
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According to Dr. T.S. Jensen, MD, "Boys and girls may define what constitutes a close friend differently." Jensen, a board-certified child and adolescent psychiatrist, reports that girls are more interested in friends who will be emotionally intimate and will share personal information. Boys, on the other hand, value a friend as someone who will spend time with them, who shares similar hobbies and interests, and who will support them in a conflict. Boys are less interested in sharing emotional intimacy with other boys and put higher value on loyalty.
Females Trust Each Other More Than Males Do
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Elizabeth R. Turner, of the psychology department of Loyola University in New Orleans, conducted a research study to determine the levels of trust between female and male same-sex friendships. Male and females between the ages of 18 and 25 were given questionnaires such as the "Specific Interpersonal Trust Scale." The results indicated that females trust their women friends more than men trust their male friends.
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20th Century Male Friendships
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According to Brett & Kate McKay, authors of "The History And Nature Of Man Friendships," competition due to market economics and the fear of being labeled as gay changed the nature of male friendships in the 20th century. Men didn't want to get too close to another man that might be vying for the same job. Generally, 20th-Century men do not display affection with other men and are uncomfortable being emotionally intimate with each other. Military friendships among males appears to be an exception as the-life and-death situation in war zones creates very strong bonds between men.
Male-female Friendships
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According to Don O'Meara, Ph.D., at the University of Cincinnati-Raymond Walters College, platonic love between a male and female can exist, although sexual tension often does, also. Kathy Werking, at Eastern Kentucky University and author of "We're Just Good Friends" believes that the main activity involved in male-female friendships is communication. Women like to get a man's perspective on topics; for instance, how to tell if a man is interested in them. Males enjoy being able to freely share their personal thoughts and feelings with women friends.
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