Secret Ways to Persuade & Influence People
Over three decades ago, a book titled "How to Win Friends and Influence People" was a best seller, indicating how hungry Americans were to exert their will on others. Today the manipulation and influence game is no less prevalent, but the means by which we do so is much more subtle. Whether you are a seeker of such power over others or one who seeks only to avoid being manipulated, it helps to know some of the secret ways the influential exert their influence.
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Dwelling on Potential Problems
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One of the subtle ways manipulators can talk you out of doing what you really want to do is by dwelling on the various things that could go wrong if you pursue your desires. Their discouragement may sound like this: "Sure, it sounds like a good idea, but I hope you've thought about ..." or "Didn't you read about that guy who tried something like that and wound up..." Planting a lot of negative seeds in your head can influence you to back down from pursuing your plan.
Getting You to Be Grateful for What You Already Have
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Some influence peddlers can secretly torpedo your plan by getting you to count your blessings. This insidious approach seems so positive on the surface because counting your blessings, in many situations, is a genuinely good thing to do. But when you are considering taking a risk or moving forward in a new way, being reminded to be grateful for what you have can subtly eat away at your resolve and keep you exactly where you are.
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Questioning Your Strength, Courage and Ego
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"What's the matter? Are you afraid? Aren't you up for the challenge?" Manipulators have been goading others by questioning their toughness since the elementary school playground days. And such challenging of the ego continues into the boardrooms and basketball courts of adult life as well. If you don't want to do something and somebody starts challenging your toughness, you can be pretty sure you're being manipulated.
This Opportunity Won't Be Around Much Longer
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Influencers often seek to elicit a hasty decision or action by emphasizing the scarcity of the opportunity they want you to pursue. "This car is not going to be on the lot tomorrow," or "I need a decision by the end of the day" are the kinds of things manipulators say to wear down your defenses and to get you to respond the way they want you to without regard for what is best for you.
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