Wedding Invitations & Gifts
When sending or receiving a wedding invitation, certain customs and traditions apply concerning gifts. Most people enjoy giving presents to a newly married couple, but in some cases, wedding gifts aren't required or even expected. Gift registries help narrow down the choice of what to give, but couples need to show grace and appreciation for all gifts regardless of whether it came from the preferred gift registry or not.
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Invitation Wording
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According to etiquette expert Emily Post, propriety demands that wedding invitations never mention gifts at all, because mentioning them turns the focus onto the gifts instead of the upcoming ceremony. It is in poor taste to include on the invitation gift-registry information or a list of items the couple wants or doesn't want. Even if the couple prefers to receive cash-only gifts or no gifts at all, it is rude to mention this, especially by printing it on the invitation. Close relatives can spread the word for the couple if asked about gift preferences.
Gift Registries
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Though it's inappropriate to mention gift registries on wedding invitations, it is fine to include an insert sharing this information when mailing bridal-shower invitations. It's also appropriate to include registry information on a personal wedding website.
If you receive a wedding invitation and want to know if the couple is registered anywhere, just ask. You can also check popular online retailers that specialize in bridal registries and search for the couple by name.
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Established Couples
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In some cases, such as in second marriages or when older people get married, couples opt out of creating a gift registry. Couples that have lived together for a while or managed their own households for years often skip the process of registering for gifts because they no longer need traditional gifts for the home. In these cases, cash or a gift card tucked inside a wedding card is an appropriate gift.
Tips for Guests
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If a wedding registry is provided, choose an item from the list that fits your budget and affection for the couple. It's best to send a gift that can be used by both the bride and the groom. Emily Post states that wedding gifts should be sent promptly. It's no longer traditional to carry the gift to the wedding reception. Send the gift shortly after receiving the invitation, or close to the wedding date. It's best to send a gift no later than three months following the wedding.
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References
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