Teaching Kids About Apologizing

Remind your child that his actions never make you love him any less.

Many young children learn the word sorry without realizing what it means. While some children apologize for the wrong reasons, others refuse to apologize at all. By teaching children about the significance of apologizing, parents give them necessary social skills, showing them how to take accountability. Lessons on apologizing prepare your child to behave in a compassionate and respectful manner. Give him the tools to not only say sorry, but also mean it.

Reasons for Apologies

Discussing the reasons for apologizing educates children about the consequences of their negative actions. Rather than simply telling your child to say sorry, ask her to think about the reasons she may feel sorry. If her actions affect someone else, prompt her to consider the way that person feels. After reviewing the results of her behavior, she will have the ability to feel sorry and prevent further offenses.

Nature of Apologies

Teaching children to explain their apologies helps reinforce the reason for apologizing. If your child repeatedly says sorry when breaking the rules, he will start to apologize by habit and disregard the need for apologies. If he hits a friend or sibling and just says "sorry," ask him what he feels sorry for. Your child can then explain, "I'm sorry for hurting you," personalizing the apology. After continual
reminders for detailed apologies, your child will start to do this naturally.

Modeling Apologies

Children take their social cues from parents and role models. By modeling sincere apologies in appropriate situations, you show your child how and when to apologize. This includes not only apologizing to fellow adults, but also saying sorry to your child when warranted. Parents who do this display responsibility and humility, giving their children important social skills.

Accepting Apologies

When teaching kids about apologizing, review with them the importance of accepting apologies. Children should understand that apologies don't always repair a situation, but can mend relationships. As children learn to forgive, they realize the importance of apologies. By encouraging your child to accept apologies gracefully and forgive easily, you give her skills for peaceful conflict resolution.

References

• Kids Health: Saying You're Sorry
• Tutorfi: Teaching Responsibility to Kids by Apologizing