Parenting Communication for a Teenage Daughter & Single Father
Parenting a teen of either gender comes with its own particular challenges, especially when you're flying solo. Single fathers may distress to find their sweet little angels turning into secretive, distant creatures who may be hard to understand and even harder to reach. Your protective instinct will definitely engage, but coming down like a hammer will often deepen the wedge between you. Instead, you have to be patient and learn how to speak her language.
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Handling Mood Swings
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When your daughter enters her teen years, her body starts to produce an influx of hormones that affect everything from her developing body to her roller coaster moods. This, combined with her lack of perspective on how minor changes affect the bigger picture, can lead her to overreact to simple challenges. Though you may find this dramatic and unnecessary, to dismiss it may translate that you dismiss things that are, at that moment in time, very important to her. Avoid trite cliches and allow her to vent. Listen, rather than dismiss her feelings, and offer her practical tips to put things in perspective.
Building Bridges
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As her body changes and she faces a sexual awakening, she be more uncomfortable with you as a member of the opposite sex. She may hug you less and shy away from overly demonstrative displays of affection. There are things she may not feel comfortable sharing with you, such as issues with her changing body, or the interest she has in boys. Don't pressure her to answer difficult or embarrassing questions. Keep the communication focused on her life in general. The less judgmental you are of the little things, the more she'll trust you with the big things.
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Understanding Her Challenges
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Not only is her body changing, but your teen daughter's world is expanding. She will face complicated, adult issues she may not be equipped to handle, such as the early pressure to have sex or the ongoing pressure to fit in to social cliques. She may likely feel insecure regarding her body and face societal pressure to look a certain way. It is up to you to stay connected to her life so you can reinforce her self-esteem and help her develop her values based on a healthy self-worth.
Accepting Her Autonomy
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Though you are her guide, ultimately her choices are her own. She is her own person and will make decisions you may not make yourself or endorse. In order to keep the lines of communication open with your daughter when she needs you the most, she needs to know she can trust you with sensitive information. Listen without judgment. Give her information so she can make the best choice possible, and always let her know she can depend on you no matter what choices she makes.
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References
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