How to Handle a Cheating Boyfriend

Has your boyfriend been unfaithful to you? Infidelity can leave couples feeling insecure, hurt and can make it difficult to trust each other again. Sometimes, the damage can carry into a new relationship if a break up occurs. Handle a cheating boyfriend by following these steps.

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

1. Acknowledge and accept your feelings of anger, sadness and disappointment over the betrayal.

2. Don't blame yourself for his actions. Remember that you can't be responsible for anyone's behavior other than your own.

3. Try to set aside your emotions and look at the situation from an outsider's point of view. What advice would you give to your friend?

4. Evaluate whether his behavior has permanently destroyed your trust in him and in your relationship. Do you believe he won't repeat his actions in the future?

5. Confront your boyfriend and tell him exactly how you feel about his actions. Let him know that cheating is not acceptable behavior in your relationship.

6. If you feel you need to know why he cheated on you to obtain closure for yourself, listen to his explanations about his behavior. Remember that listening does not mean you condone, agree with or accept his behavior.

7. Don't allow him to manipulate your feelings with sweet words of apology or promises never to cheat on you again. Be realistic. Do you honestly believe this was a one-time event, or do your instincts tell you that he'll probably cheat on you again in the future?

8. Ask yourself if you would be better off with him or without him. Can you continue to enjoy the relationship, knowing about the betrayal?

9. Find a constructive outlet for your emotions of disappointment and anger.

10. Give yourself time to grieve over the betrayal. Whether you stay with him or not, forgive him for his actions so you can heal and move on with your life.

[annilou]

on 9/10/2009 im suppose to be getting married in 2 weeks but ive only just found out that my fiance was cheating on me, with his ex. i only found out because i accidentally found his card bills, he has been booking rooms in b&b's for 7 months now way before he even proposed. i asked him about it and he denied and when i showed him the bill he flipped said i was nosy and shouldnt look through his things thats when i left and stayed with some friends. he came around the next day and the next saying he was sorry that he only went to see her because she was going through a rough patch and needed some help and that he loved me. the wedding iss still booked and i still love him for what ever reason but i dont know what to do can someone help me?

[xxxoo1234xxxoo]

on 9/2/2009 I found out that my boyfriend of 5 yrs was cheating on me for a year with a 33yr old woman. He had a second phone that I knew nothing about. I kept seeing a charger in his car that was unfamiliar and I questioned him and all he said was that his boys left it in his car. Ok about a month later the same incident happened again. I took it upon myself to investigate. I called one of his boys and we were talking and he let me know that indeed there was another woman. I questioned my man, but of course he denied it. He came over to my place and “I put his a** to sleep”. I searched his car and found the second phone which he had her titled as bay&wifey. Damn that blew my mind and it hurt so much. I called the girl and invited her over to my place and she saw him in my bed and confronted him. I was so in shock that this was taking place all I did was just stand there in awww. She left and ...

[yobay]

on 8/28/2009 My boyfriend and father of my child is cheating on me.We've been together for the last 7yrs,He cheated on me when I was pregnant and I forgave him cause I didn't want my baby to grow up in a broken home.I only found out today that he is still talking to the girl that he cheated on me with along with a few other women.He says he wants to be with me but I can't find it in my heart to trust him,He never lets me answer his phone of check his messages.Most of the time when we he's home he doesn't answer his phone,he just picks it up look at the number and put it back down.I'm sooo disappointed in myself that I chose someone like him to spend the rest of my life with and be the father of my child.It's really tough on me cause I can't talk to my family about this,they all dislike him very much for the way he's treated me in the past.This is destroying me.What can I do???

[beerss93]

on 8/16/2009 My boyfriend of almost 3 years cheated on me with the mother of his first child and with her girlfriend that shes been with for years.I'm 7 months pregnant and he didn't use any type of protection with either one of them. He missed our baby shower because he was at her house having sex. Now I'm really upset that he even slept with me after he slept with them unprotected. They said they were clean but I still need to go get checked. It was funny too because I asked millions of times to not drink with them because I had a feeling that he may sleep with one of them if he was drunk enough. I'm wondering if I should stay with him or not. What should I do? Does any one have any type of advice for me? I'm losing my mind but trying to not stress out because I'm pregnant.

[4mybrokeheart]

on 6/28/2009 my boyfriend cheated on me when he was in another state for his best friends college graduation. He was planning a 3 day trip to yet another state when I found out he set up a secret email account and was replying to girls on a dating site trying to hook up with them while he was there. The day after I found out about the secret email I found out that he had cheated when he was gone for the college graduation. It was 6 months before I found out, I even got a STD and he tried to tell me it was some other infection and the dr was wrong cause he didn't have it. It happened over a year ago now, but I just don't know how to deal with it. We have been living together for 3 years.