How to Encourage a Toddler to Use Good Manners

Good manners don't come naturally. Toddlers need a lot of gentle reminding to remember their p's and q's (please and thank yous).

Difficulty: Moderate

Instructions

Things You'll Need:

• Berenstain Bears :Forget Their Manners
• Manners
• Barney's Best Manners

1. Model good manners to your toddler. Say please and thank you to your toddler when appropriate. If your toddler sneezes say, "Bless you." If you want your toddler to move say, "Excuse me."

2. Praise your child when he or she exhibits appropriate behavior. Say things like "Nice manners!" "Thank you for being polite," or "You are so polite," when your toddler uses good manners.

3. Tell your toddler how you'd rather he behave if he is rude or impolite. If he hits, tell him you want him to be nice or gentle. Tell your toddler that hitting is bad manners.

4. Talk about other people's behavior. When you see someone using good manners, point it out to your child. Use the people in your family and household as frequent examples.

5. Read books and sing songs about good manners. Watch videos on the topic. Work politeness into every day in some way.

6. Use a simple consequence like time out for refusal to use good manners. Give a warning once and then follow through with the consequence.

Tips & Warnings

• Time out is most effective if the time spent in time out is determined by the child's age. Follow this formula: one year = one minute. Do not exceed the time limit.
• Give rewards for using good manners if you are trying to break a bad habit.
• Be consistent and clear with your expectations and consequences. Don't let things slide one day and not the next.
• Failure to be consistent may result in sporadic behavior from your child.
• Consult a professional family doctor if you experience extreme frustration or anger when disciplining your child.

on 11/22/2005 You yourself must first realize the importance of good manners and set the example. If your child doesn't see you respecting others, he or she will grow to be rude to everyone including you. It's important that they learn and understand young.

on 11/22/2005 Correct your toddler's mistakes but also your own and your spouse's, and always do it respectfully and constructively! This shows it's important that everyone use good manners and that everyone makes mistakes! Read "Polite Elephant" by Richard Scarry.

on 11/22/2005 Say "thank you" every time your baby/toddler gives you something willingly (e.g. a toy or a hug). It works! We have done this for months and now our 20-month-old says "thank you" whenever someone gives her something she wants.