How to Model Behavior for Preschoolers

Bend down to talk to preschoolers.

Preschoolers are keen observers and they love to imitate behavior. Many parents know what they say may be repeated, and they tend to watch their language. By constantly listening and watching, preschoolers learn which behavior is good or bad. This means that it is vital that parents are aware of what sort of behavior they are modeling. You want your child to learn to show respect for other children and adults. Several different strategies can be used to ensure that you model the best possible behavior to your preschooler.

Instructions

1. Write a list of things you want your preschooler to learn, and how you want him to behave toward other people. The best way to help your preschooler to grow up into the person you want is to model the behavior to him. Describing your goals makes it easier to ensure that you are modeling the desired behavior.

2. Describe your strengths and weaknesses. Spend time thinking about how these may affect the behavior you want to model. You may want her to act calmly and not argue. As a parent, you need to show her that you can handle stress by organizing things and acting calmly yourself. You need to model that you must think about what you are going to say instead of arguing with her.

3. Search for books about strategies that help you act in a positive way as a parent. Modeling behavior requires awareness of not only how you act but also of strategies of how you should act in certain situations.

4. Learn to accept responsibility. Sometimes you may act in a manner that is not modeling a suitable behavior. Be honest and explain to her why this was not the best way to act in the situation. Talk about the way you act in situations and explain why you are doing things in a certain way.

5. Model your behavior in multiple ways. Show the behavior you want her to imitate by practicing what you say. If you say one thing and act in a different manner, he will model that behavior. As his language develops, he will notice the mixed messages, and he will lose trust in your advice.

6. Chose the moment and situation when you want to model a behavior. She may be constantly watching and listening, but you want to ensure that she is focused. Choose calm situations to explicitly model behaviors. Repeat the behavior in many situations. If you want her to say "Thank you," say thank you to your child in several situations. Say thank you for eating your breakfast, picking up your toys and helping me to find the car keys.

Tips & Warnings

• There are many influences and people who may serve as models. Sometimes there may be large discrepancies between the modeling of a behavior in a household. Talk about and discuss what sort of behavior you want her to model.

• Modeling a behavior does not ensure that your preschooler will behave in the desired manner. Give her time, be patient and keep modeling the behavior.

References

• Psych Central.: Modeling Behavior for Children Has Long-Lasting Effects: 2011

Resources

• Teachnet, The University of Texas at Austin: : Social Learning Theory: 2005