How to Ask a Girlfriend's Dad About Proposing
While the ritual act of requesting a father's permission before marrying his daughter is no longer necessary, it does show respect to the bride's family and generates good will at the beginning of what is hopefully a very long relationship. Asking permission shows that you recognize the relationship that your betrothed has with her father and that you respect his role in her life.
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Instructions
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Get to know the father before it gets to the point of proposal. If the father lives a great distance away, this may not be possible. However, if you can invite her family over for dinner, or spend time with her family before asking her father for permission, the fact that you are familiar with each other will make it much easier.
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Make sure your girlfriend is on board with the idea of marriage. You are wasting your time if you ask her father's permission only to have her tell you that she has no interest in marriage.
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Discuss the matter in person. This conversation is not effective by phone or text. Unless there is no possible way to travel to his home, or to meet him somewhere, make every effort to meet him face to face.
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Be honest about how you feel about his daughter. Avoid talking about her looks or sense of style. Focus on things that her father likely had a hand in developing. Mention her sharing spirit, or how much compassion she has for others. This tells the father that you know who his daughter is, and you are not just attracted to her looks.
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Ask him for his daughter's hand. Explain that you intend to marry her, and that his blessing would make the occasion perfect. Avoid confrontational language like "I'm going to marry her no matter what you say," and be polite and respectful throughout the process.
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