Financial problems are often a common reason a person decides to stay in a troubled marriage---if you do not have savings available, you may worry that you cannot leave your spouse and make ends meet. However, a lack of funds does not mean that you have to stay in an unhappy marriage, particularly if you are dealing with an abusive spouse. Simple strategies can help you find the resources you need to leave your marriage.
Call your county's Department of Social Services. A social services counselor can give you the contact information for resources in your area that can provide assistance for living arrangements and money so you and your children can move out of your home and start a new life.
Visit your local YWCA to ask about support services. The YWCA in your area may provide temporary shelter, legal advocacy, counseling and other services to help you escape from an abusive marriage and start your own life.
Call your local police department if you need to leave your marriage because of a spouse's abuse. The police can refer you to a women's shelter and provide protection from your spouse.
Ask a friend or family member for assistance. A trusted family member or friend may offer you a place to stay, food and other assistance while you are looking for a job or other source of income. She can also provide a sympathetic ear so you can talk about your feelings and begin to recover from the stress of your marriage.
Contact local churches in your area to ask for support. A church typically does not require membership or even belief in a particular faith to obtain financial and emotional support.
Tips & Warnings
- Accept that you may have to give up some of the comforts you are used to in order to leave an unhappy or abusive marriage. Also, keep in mind that you will only have to give up comforts temporarily---once the stress of an abusive marriage is behind you, you can focus your efforts on getting a better job, pursuing education or entrepreneurial endeavors to build an independent, successful life.
- Don't be ashamed to ask for help. Churches, social service agencies, family members and others who can provide assistance are not interested in judging your situation. Instead, they are interested in helping you obtain freedom and start a new life for yourself and your children.
- "The Emotionally Abusive Relationship"; Beverly Engel; 2003
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