How to Be Less Sensitive to Insults

Ignore insulting comments to prevent feeling angry and hurt.

Coping well with insults is an important skill if you want to be a happy and confident person. Some insults are intentional and mean-spirited, while others are unintentional and innocent. Regardless of the source, insults can make you feel hurt and angry and can decrease your self-esteem. Learning to be less sensitive to insults enables you to maintain a sense of self-confidence and a joyful spirit.

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Instructions

- 1
  
  Tell yourself that the insult is not true. Reverse the insult out loud or quietly to yourself, and make the statement positive. If the person said, "You are a terrible parent," tell yourself "I may not always be perfect, but I am a good parent." Repeat this to yourself a few times.
- 2
  
  Examine the mood of the speaker who insulted you. Determine if he seemed angry, depressed or anxious. Often people say insulting things because they feel bad themselves. Perhaps the person was having a bad day at work or is going through a divorce. This does not excuse offensive behavior, but does put the person's statements in perspective. Tell yourself that the person may not really mean what he said.
- 3
  
  Determine if the person is trying to be helpful. Some people feel that by pointing out negative things, they are helping you improve yourself. They may have good intentions, but are not speaking tactfully. If this is the case, tell yourself that the person is only trying to help and does not mean to hurt you. Then focus on the intent behind the insult, rather than the hurtful words, to determine if there is something on which you can improve.
- 4
  
  Participate in relaxing activities. Rather than ruminating over the insulting comment, find a way to relax. Listen to a meditation CD, go for a walk outside or read a book. Do anything that relaxes you and helps prevent you from thinking negatively about the comment or yourself.