How to Teach Children Patience & Self-Restraint
It is very important that parents begin teaching their children about the valuable concepts of patience and self-restraint from a very early age. If parents instill a foundation of patience from the beginning, it will help a child maintain that behavior throughout life. These values can help a child greatly, from encouraging problem-solving attitudes and acting in a calm manner to making a good impression on other people. Take action and raise a child who is patient and in control at all times.
Other People Are Reading
Instructions
-
-
1
Set a good example. In order to expect patient behavior from a child, parents need to behave in that way themselves. Remember that children tend to copy the actions of parents, both good and bad. For example, no matter how agitated or frustrated you may be (whether you have been on hold with customer service on the phone for an hour or are simply upset about your job), abstain from responding to your child in an impatient and snippy manner. When you act impatiently, you send a message to your child that the behavior is acceptable and that you endorse it.
-
2
Discuss the meaning of time with your child. Children can be antsy and restless, and a one-hour drive to grandma's house can seem like an eternity. Instead of simply telling your child "We'll be there in one hour," try to focus on talking about what you plan on doing during that time frame instead. Say something like, "We're going to look outside the window at the farmhouses and cows, and then we're going to play crossword puzzles." After you are done with those things, announce that it all took roughly an hour. Make the idea of time seem more real by detailing events and activities.
-
-
3
Listen to your child. When you are waiting in a long line to speak with the teller at the bank, acknowledge to your child that you know how he or she is feeling. Say something like, "Waiting can be tough. But we all have to be fair and wait our turns." Indicate to your child that you are aware of how he or she is feeling, and then ask him or her to elaborate on that. Show your child that you are actively listening and care about what he or she is saying. Ask your child if he or she is tired, bored or hungry, or perhaps afraid of missing his or her favorite cartoon show. Sometimes, all a child wants is a little attention in these situations.
-
4
Find constructive ways to pass time. Encourage patience and self-restraint by figuring out smart ways for a child to pass time. For instance, if you are waiting at the dentist's office for half an hour, ask your child if he or she wants to learn new vocabulary words. Then, teach him or her some useful words and test him or her on the definitions in a few minutes. Be productive and teach your child how to make the best use of time instead of getting impatient and restless and losing control and restraint.
-
5
Tell your child to make a "wish list." Children often become impatient and throw temper tantrums when they want something they cannot have. If your child passes the toy store at the mall and starts yelling because he or she wants a new toy, tell him to write the name of it down (along with his other "wants") so he can get it for his birthday or a coming holiday (whether it is Christmas, Hanukkah or any other occasion). Encouraging your child to wait for things he or she wants can help develop self-control, self-restraint, patience and even appreciation for the value of things.
-
6
Help your child attain patience and discipline through activities. One effective way for a child to cultivate patience and self-restraint is through trying new endeavors that require a lot of time and diligence, whether it is playing the violin, painting or playing basketball. Also, consider reading storybooks aloud to your child on a regular basis. If you encourage your child to follow a storyline, it can help nurture the concepts of patience and active listening.
-
1
Tips & Warnings
When a child becomes excessively impatient or upset when he or she cannot accomplish something quickly or easily, get him or her to take a quick break to clear his or her mind and collect his or her feelings. Teach your child that a little bit of clarity and time away from something can help regain perspective and stop the feelings of impatience and annoyance.
References
- Photo Credit Jupiterimages/BananaStock/Getty Images
