How to Find a Counselor to Help With Verbal Abuse in Marriage
Verbal abuse in marriage is more common than any other type of abuse, but it is the least recognized. Many individuals in verbally abusive marriages do not realize that they are experiencing a form of abuse and fail to get help. If your partner calls you names, shouts constantly, blames you for everything, uses threats to control your behavior, and/or shames you using verbal comments, you may be experiencing verbal abuse. No one should have to deal with being subjected to verbal abuse from a spouse, so if you recognize these symptoms in your own marriage, you can find a counselor to talk to who will give you solutions to dealing with the abuse.
Instructions
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Decide what type of therapy you need. If you are experiencing verbal abuse within your marriage, make a personal decision about whether you would prefer couples counseling or individual counseling. This includes making the decision about whether you want to invite your partner to attend sessions with you and accepting the possibility that he may refuse.
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Locate a source of counselors. There are many online resources, such as Psychology Today's list of therapists by state and the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy's Therapist Locator. You can also call a local university's department of psychology and ask for references for recent graduates of their program or current faculty members with open practices. Another method for locating therapists is to contact a large clinic in your area and ask the receptionist to refer you to a specialist who can help you.
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Choose a counselor from your compiled list. Married individuals dealing with verbal abuse may benefit most from therapy with a marriage and family therapist. Marriage and family therapists spend many years of graduate study focused specifically on issues faced in marriage, while individuals with degrees in psychiatry or clinical psychology are trained primarily to treat mental disorders and other psychological problems with a much smaller emphasis on marriage. Therefore, when choosing a counselor, you may want to choose a marriage and family therapist.
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Make an initial appointment. During your first visit, ask the counselor questions about her credentials, her success with past patients affected by verbal abuse in marriage, and what policies and fees are associated with therapy. If you do not feel completely comfortable with the counselor you chose, consider trying another one. Verbal abuse is a highly personal and often uncomfortable subject. Trying to discuss it with someone you do not feel completely comfortable with can inhibit any progress you might gain in therapy.
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