How to Stop & Avoid Insults

Standing up for a friend who is being insulted is a good way to strengthen a friendship.

Stopping and avoiding insults about friends, family or any people you care about is simple if you know what to say. While it is easy to make a degrading comment about a person, it is far more difficult to stand up for a person you love and say something uplifting about her. However, it is possible for someone who wants to spare the emotions of the person being insulted. If you or someone you know is being insulted, there are a few things you can do to stop and avoid insults.

Instructions

1. Interrupt the insult. The first thing you can do if you see a person insulting someone you care about is to interrupt her. Whether she is doing it in front of your friend or behind your friend's back, it is important that you put an immediate stop to the behavior. You may feel like there is nothing you can do, or that your request will not make a difference. However, standing up for someone is a difficult thing to do and is respected by most people.

2. Explain the truth. If a person is insulting your friend and you know better than what he is saying, you can explain the reality of the situation to clear the air up. For example, if you hear someone saying that your friend wears ugly, mismatched clothing or always seems dirty, you can explain that she is going through a difficult time financially right now, and that her family cannot afford to give her adequate clothing or toiletries. Your compassion for your friend will shine through and may be passed on to others.

3. Ask for a change in behavior. Requesting that the person who is insulting your friend immediately stop her behavior is the next step to stop and avoid insults. State that you do not want your friend's feelings to be hurt, and that you care too much about him to let these insults continue. Being bold about wanting this behavior changed will make a difference in the life of your friend and will earn you more respect.

4. Inform your friend. This is the next step to take if the insulting is going on behind your friend's back. Let your friend know in a clear way that there are people who are insulting her, and to stay away from these people at all costs. Tell your friend that she is beautiful and valuable to you, and that you do not want her feelings to be hurt. Promise to stay by her side and stick up for her at all costs.

5. Stay away from people who insult others. If you hear people insulting your friend, stay away from them, except to tell them to stop their improper conduct. If you associate with them, your friend may think you are contributing to the insults or adding to the degrading things they are saying. Make it a point to hang out with people who are positive, uplifting and supportive of others.

References

• Men with Pens: What to Do When You've Been Insulted
• Top Tip Spot: How to React to Verbal Abuse

Resources

• Read this Article in Spanish
• Don Brock; Why Do People Insult Other People?; February 2009
• All Voices; How to Avoid Heat of the Moment Insults; Chy Chy Munich; July 2010