How to Address Condolences

Sending condolence letters is considered propert etiquette.

Sending a condolence card is not something anyone enjoys doing, but it is proper etiquette in a time of loss. The recipient of your condolence card is grieving, and your card is a reminder that people cared for the person who died. Correctly addressing your condolence card could prevent any unintentional offense.

Instructions

1. Address your condolences to a close friend or family member by including the name of the friend, spouse, and family. For example, address your card to either "Jake and Mary Smith" or "Jake and Mary Smith and family."

2. If you do not know the name of the spouse, address your condolences to just the person whose name you know and the family. For example, send your condolences to "Jake Smith and family."

3. Send condolences for the death of a colleague or friend whose family you do not know. In this instance you should address your condolences to the family of your friend or colleague, such as "The family of Jake Smith."

4. Address condolences to a widow by using her deceased husband's name. According to current etiquette, this is the proper method of addressing a widow. For example, address your condolences to "Mrs. Jake Smith." If the widow prefers you not to address her by her late husband's name, you can address your condolences to "Ms. Mary Smith" or "Mrs. Mary Smith."

References

• Sympathy Cards Direct: Guidelines for Addressing your Sympathy Cards
• Emily Post: Guide to Addressing Correspondence