How to Avoid Aggressive Outbursts With Relatives
Family members may enter into conflict due to a difference in views and beliefs, inadequate contributions to the family or unforeseen stressful situations. Conflict often arises due to a lack in communication or a misunderstanding of motivations and actions. Learning how to effectively communicate your ideas and feelings will lead to fewer aggressive outbursts between you and your family members.
Instructions
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Wait before you confront a relative about something they said. Give yourself time to think about it. Ask yourself what bothered you about what they just said. Ask yourself why that bothered you. If you speak before gathering your thoughts, your relatives might misunderstand your views, thereby creating more conflict and aggression.
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Ask clarifying questions before an argument begins. Conflict is often caused by misunderstanding.
During emotional situations, people may say things which they do not mean. Giving your family members the opportunity to rethink their thoughts will be beneficial to everyone.
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Find common ground between your opinion and your relatives' feelings. Most conflict ends in aggression because no commonality has been reached. Frustration manifests itself in raised voices, angry gestures and increased tension. Leaving out small details, discover what in this conflict is important to both parties. For example, your family might experience tension around picking up the flowers for the reunion. The common ground is hosting a fun family reunion--everyone wants this. You may not know that one family is dealing with a problem at school and does not have time to pick up the flowers. Once you know this, you are more likely to be understanding and pick up the flowers yourself.
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Clearly state your expectations at the end of the conversation. Everyone should be happier with the compromise, as it help avoid future outbursts.
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Tips & Warnings
Stay calm when you think a relative might become aggressive.
Call the police if you ever feel physically or emotionally threatened by a member of your family.
References
Resources
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