How to Evaluate Your Ability to Communicate With Your Spouse

Evaluating your ability to communicate with your spouse ensures that you are making efforts to be the best spouse that you can be.

Communication is the foundation of any relationship, professional or personal. That is especially true of marriage. Being able to communicate effectively with your spouse is imperative to a healthy union. Taking the time to earnestly evaluate your ability to communicate with your significant other is a worthwhile feat that will keep your marriage nourished and thriving for years to come.

Instructions

1. Ask yourself, "Am I being respectful toward my spouse when communicating?" In a society where sarcasm, and ridicule are prevalent in television, and on the Internet, it is easy to adopt a snarky style of communication. While you may not realize that you are coming across as rude or condescending, your spouse realizes it. After a long day of working, or tending to children, the last thing that a person wants is to have a conversation with someone who comes across as less than caring. Before you are tempted to use sarcasm, or demeaning humor, think of how this may effect your conversation. If your spouse feels disrespected, he or she is less likely to participate in a meaningful or pleasurable chat with you.

2. Evaluate your timing. Everyone is familiar with the phrase "timing is everything." That's especially true for marital conversation. Are you trying to bombard your spouse with a conversation about finances the moment that she walks in the door after a long day of work? At this moment your spouse is probably mentally and physically tired. Even if she wants to, she can't wholeheartedly contribute to this conversation.

   Regardless of what kind of conversation you are trying to have (whether it be serious, or lighthearted), examine your surroundings and determine if this is truly the best time to bring something up.

3. Assess past conversations and determine if you have always been honest with your spouse. Even a little white lie is still a lie. In your assessment, if you find that you have been habitually filling your conversation with lies (even small ones), you probably need to make some changes to your style of communication. Never underestimate your husband's ability to intuitively know that you are not being truthful. While he may not call you out on your little lies, he may begin to tune you out as his trust in you diminishes.

Tips & Warnings

• You can always ask your spouse how can better communicate with him or her. Chances are that your spouse will appreciate your efforts to improve communication.

References

• Marriage Communication