How to Find Love As an Introvert


The idea of finding love and romance when you are a quiet and introverted person can seem next to impossible. After all, dating people involves meeting them, getting to know them and developing a strong emotional connection. The thought alone might make you feel intimidated. You may ask yourself how you can do that when you have a naturally shy and quiet personality, and talking to strangers just isn't your forte.

  • Ask your family and friends for help. As an introvert, you might cringe at the thought of approaching strangers alone in a hot nightspot. To avoid that nightmare scenario, recruit your closest family and friends.Tell that you want to meet new people, maybe even to date. Your family and friends know you better than anybody else and are aware that you are an introvert. With some good luck, they will be able to introduce you to a compatible personality type.

  • Partake in social activities. If your friends and family do not know anyone to set you up with, get out of your comfort zone and get social. Even if you are not comfortable with meeting people at nightspots, participate in social activities that you are interested in and that also might offer good opportunities for you to meet dating prospects. Some examples include creative writing and photography classes, dance classes, sports such as tennis and volleyball) and volunteer work. Attempt to do these things a minimum of once or twice weekly. The more you surround yourself with different personality types and people, the more open you will be to speaking with them. Also, if you aren't around people, you will never get a chance to meet them, so get out there.

  • Use the Internet. One of the advantages of the modern age is not being limited in terms of dating. As an introvert, online dating is ideal. Sign up for a dating website and create a profile that details your introverted personality type. Browse through user profiles of potential matches and look for people that seem compatible with you. This process can easily weed out extroverted people or other types of people that would not mesh well with your quiet persona. Be careful with your online dating approach, and do not offer any personal details. Try to speak on the phone with the person before meeting up with them in person. as well.

  • Learn relaxation techniques. For an introverted personality type, the concept of finding love can be very stressful and anxiety-inducing. To proceed about dating in a calm and relaxed manner, learn some relaxation techniques that can help you feel calm about the whole thing. Try the classic breathing exercise of taking a deep breath, counting up to four and then very slowly exhaling. Also try visualization techniques for relaxation. Sit back and picture vividly being in a state of absolute relaxation, and all of the sights and scents that come along with it. While envisioning these things, inhale deeply and relax and loosen up any parts of your body that are experiencing tension. These exercises can be particularly helpful right before you meet a new person or engage in a social activity that involves speaking.

Tips & Warnings

  • Be patient. Finding true love is by no means something that comes overnight, especially if you are a shy introvert. You likely aren't going to find the romance of your life after just two weeks of taking pottery classes, for example. Keep at it, persevere, have fun and when you least expect it, you might just find the person of your dreams.


  • Photo Credit Jupiterimages/Goodshoot/Getty Images
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