How to Control Your Son's Temper
If you are dealing with a temper problem in your son, you might feel overwhelmed at the yelling, demands and public embarrassments. The National Association of School Psychologists says that temper problems occur in both boys and girls at the same rate, and that they are a normal part of a child's development. Knowing how to diffuse and handle the problem, though, can give you peace of mind when trying to control your son, especially when you have to go out.
Other People Are Reading
Instructions
-
-
1
Identify your son's trigger situations. The best way to manage tantrums is to prevent them. Keep a log for a week or two and write down where and when your son has a tantrum. Write down his mood before the tantrum and what prompted it in this particular instance. You might find that he has a hard time transitioning from playing to nap time, or that he has difficulty getting into the car when he is leaving a friend's house. If your son is simply throwing temper tantrums to get your attention, you can choose to ignore him, and he will learn that screaming is not an acceptable way to get what he wants.
-
2
Intervene when you see your son getting ready to act out. When you see the telltale signs that his temper is about to erupt, get down to his level, and say, "I can see you are getting upset. Slow down." Or, you could say, "Pay attention to how your body feels right now. Let's take a breath."
-
-
3
Stay calm if he continues to escalate. While your first inclination could be to yell or hit him, count to ten, because if you remain calm, the situation might not escalate as much. Think about the reason for the escalation. Is it possible to remedy the situation another way?
-
4
Speak about the situation with the child after he calms down. Try to help him solve his problem, and ask him what other ways he could have handled his frustration. Do not reward or give in to his demands at this point.
-
1
Tips & Warnings
While all children can get physically aggressive when they have temper issues, many boys are large enough to do damage if they are allowed to act as they wish. If your child is getting physical, and you are worried that he could hurt someone, remove him from the situation immediately. Strap him quickly in the car or put him in his room or another area where he cannot get to other people. Remind him that when he has calmed down, he will be able to come out. If you are not worried about your safety, you can also hold the child tightly until he calms down so that he will not hurt others around him.
References
- Photo Credit Jupiterimages/Goodshoot/Getty Images
